What I think might be the case (sadly by first hand experience) is that independence derives from action, and action is inversely proportional to words. The more energy spent on this type of overexplained diatribe, the more one inhabits the head and not the heart...and we keep repeating and disserting our victimhood until we believe in its merits and in our grandiose ability to verbalize our excuses for life not being what it could be. I can tell you from personal experience, this is dangerous ground.