Poem / Deep Down

in #poetry7 years ago

Deep Down


image Credits

Memories of you.

I looked calm and relaxed on the outside.
But inside, I died a little more each time.

I hoped for a better tomorrow…
A day with less pain, caused by you.
A day of cleansing rain, removing you.

Trying my best to keep myself in check.
I was a sailor in rough sea conditions,
Trying my best to keep myself on deck,
Losing my grip, and finding new positions.

The questions of what and why,
Buzzed like a swarm of bees in my mind.
Why did you leave?
What did I do to make you grieve?
Why did you look so relieved?

The answers never came,
You played me like a game.
I did my best to impress,
And in the end, I was only second best.
I may look calm and collected,
But deep down I’m hurt and dejected.

Note: If there are any spelling errors or things you disagree with, I would appreciate it if you let me know :)

By Ethan
2018/01/13

Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed! If you did and want to hear more you can follow me here (^~^) <(^~^<)

Sort:  

Again, this went right through my heart.

So beautiful, so painful.
My heart is breaking. 💔💔💔

Very nice poem. I hope it is not one from personal experience. There are not misspellings. I don't think you should worry about people disagreeing with you say in your poem. It's your poem. It's how YOU feel, not them. Anyway, it is a well written poem. Thanks for sharing it.

Thank you, it is a personal experience :|

It's amazing how much beauty could be made by molding and channeling pain. And all that beauty is so clear in these lines.

That was a so excellent @xxsenpaixsamaxx
✌✌✌👍👍👍

Nice poem. It has a beautiful idea. Thanks for sharing the post.

Thank you for this post. So good to hear of someone who can inspire someone to love and admire them

I am a great poet and poet to you always. Implied deep story ...

Trying my best to keep myself in check.
I was a sailor in rough sea conditions,
Trying my best to keep myself on deck,
Losing my grip, and finding new positions.

The whole poem is great, but this bit is just plain beautiful. The drama is powerful, the images are vivid and the technique is perfect.

You have a great talent. Thank you very much for sharing.

i know the throbs of misery,
the epiphany of complete dejection,
through your eyes is played chords of my anathema
the memories of you clubs me till my vertebral column shatters,
into pieces of me, lost and never found.

Your lines inspired this. @xxsenpaixsamaxx

Thank you, They are beautiful...

Coin Marketplace

STEEM 0.20
TRX 0.19
JST 0.034
BTC 89752.15
ETH 3297.99
USDT 1.00
SBD 3.02