The Levels of Depression (Original poem/story)

in #poetry8 years ago

It all starts when you hit that first breaking point.
It's like opening a gateway.
And then the flood begins.
The tears never stop coming.
Every night you feel so empty.
You wonder what you are worth.
You wonder if you are worth anything at all.
Everyday feels meaningless.
The pain never stops.
Your thoughts constantly wind around the same few things.
Everything that went wrong.
Everything you did wrong.
Everything has somehow become your fault.
You begin to question everything.
Your pain slowly but surely begins to transform into numbness.
You have become just as blank state.
You are nothing.
You are alone.
You are scared.
and you are tired.
Your body is constantly aching.
You haven't had a good night's sleep in months.
You have resulted to harming.
Not only others, but also yourself.
You don't know how to cope with the world anymore.
You want it all to end.
But you lack the bravery to do it.
You just sit back and let the world have you.
You suffer in silence.
At least you aren't crying anymore.
It's like your body has lost all feeling.
You have run out of tears.
The sadness is frozen inside of you.
You begin feeling angry.
You ask: why me?
What did I do to deserve this?
Why is god punishing me?
Or is god even real.
You question everything.
Who loves you.
Who cares for you.
All you want is to be comforted.
You just want one single hug.
Why can't anyone give you a fucking hug?
The world is playing tricks on you.
Kicking dirt in your face while you are down.
You are so lonely.
Will it ever get better?
That is up to you.

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I've been in that moment. Well written and captured. I think it is so important that people are made aware of how self debilitating depression can be. We need to remove the stigma as it seems like that when your mind turns against you, it is like hell.

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