SteemitPoetryContest #10 - Divine Metamorphosis
@terrycraft, I hope you like my participation.
Source Image
to sleep the so silent caterpillar in its niche,
it will gloat in itself among moon clothes,
until the larva hatches between its viscous nest.
a worm that devours the nest that covered it
divine metamorphosis becomes in a chrysalis
... And so she so quiet comes dying her wings.
and you will fly among flowers sipping their sweet nectar,
with the joy of the human who looks at you ecstatically
fly, flies butterfly among cicadas that sing.
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@jeadeg, You have done a very good job crafting this poem in a language that is not your first language! Poetry is especially difficult because there might not be a vast vocabulary in the recesses of the mind just waiting to be drawn out. Rhyme, rhythm and meaning must all converge in something emotional; something that touches the spirit in some raw way.
Here is a English language improvement suggestion for you to consider. Because this is poetry there are many options, and my suggestions are just what came to mind at the moment. Please feel free to use them, or not, as you desire.
or
I've upvoted and resteemed this article as one of my daily post promotions on the @mitneb Curation Trail. I'm following you now, too.
Cheers!
Thank you very much @mitneb, your suggestions will be taken with great pleasure, for that we are in steemit to learn and improve every day with the advice that people like you give us.
Thanks again and from now on I will give more effort to the publications in English to count on your support.
Greetings.
You're welcome, @jeadeg! Did you know that you can edit your articles before the 7 day payout freeze?
Cheers!
The poetry is beautiful makes the imagination fly at the moment of inspiration that beautiful to enjoy the talent of the members of the community congratulations.
Thank you very much my friend, that same feels when you translate those beautiful words on paper. regards