The Monster You Know
She took a saw to my heart and quite rightfully so. I stitched it up though.
Now I sit in the dark and I know I must go. Please say it ain’t so
Everything in my life dies,
I think I ought to cry. I can’t though
Feelings are all dry, on my back staring up. Should probably get up but, no
Earth vomits the sun, a new day of disappointment.
That’s my life though
I’ll wait for the night again, when she kisses my dreams. Does she even know?
Used to taste her tears, flavored with regret. I spit it out though.
Couldn’t compete with her joy, I target to destroy. Destroyed my own
That psychopath I was, sleeps in a bed of normality. Don’t wake him though
Watch what you wish for, I’ll be back like a storm. The monster you know
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I know I'm a bad girl.
That monster you know is the very same monster we all know; the darkest, most self-destructive thoughts that abide in our minds, refusing to leave us alone. (They often make us afraid, or make us think we will be in fear, if we let go of these thoughts and cleanse our minds.) That void, the lack of that negative script we tell ourselves daily, IS scary, but that fear, too, must be dropped.
I see an underlying theme of reoccurring admiration in the poem, as if there is beauty in this monster and his presence is cherrished. This can create a paradoxial loop and a viscious cycle in us all - recognising the beauty in pain - for we might never want to leave that state of mind the more and more we get acustomed to it all. This is 'the bed of normality' you touch on.
As for the style, I adore the personification of concepts like the night and Earth. It allows the reader to have a more intimate relationship with them. This whole piece is written in a dialouge with yourself kind of way which makes it more confessional than it would be otherwise I believe. You truly did a great job!
As for the girl that 'took the saw to [your] heart', you claim to have stitched it back together, yet I'd go on to say that she never cut you open in the first place. The ides that someone is capable of breaking you and your heart, which I will take the liberty to say that this is what this symbolises, simply gifts the person with power to do so; If you realise that you cannot be broken, there cannot be a heartBREAK.
Thanks you for sharing your emotions with us all. It was a pleasure reading this art piece!
If you have some free time and are interested, I invite you over to my page to have a look at my poetry.
Cheers.
Lukasz.
Wow, love this analysis! Thank you!
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You are very welcome!