Drown My Fear
When light drains away the pigment there is barely enough left,even for shadows. It feels like there is nothing to release myself away from that darkness. Everything is hidden, including myself.
It feels like the world, my world has gone into 'storm' mode. The air has imbalance, my ears are sharper, my mind paranoid. My vision screams- predator. My body is set for flight fright or freeze. For the most part i choose freeze.
Still.
Praying that when blackness takes heed of me, the dawn is not too far behind.
I yearn for tomorrow enough to persevere this position for as long as it takes.
Thus, the painful reality of anxiety.
Who made you so afraid, my love?
afraid for the future, and afraid for the past.
they need not exist in your world.
its all an illusion.
to evoke a memory, you must first envision it
in order for it to survive.
this fear is my delusion.and I know how you behave.
you will carry me. you will take me by the hand
head-on, to everything that's dear to me - beloved and precious.
but I know your scent. and i am ready for you.
i have figured you out and i am ready to let you go.
you have exasperated me to the point where finding myself
became my only grace.
my love is no longer fixed, it sparkles.
without fear it's brighter, robust and unfathomable.
i am now my own master. i feel rejuvenated.
my last fear will be of my own strength.
i am prepared.
you are not of my world
but of a wilted comprehension.
only sunlight in my doorway
only gentle rain in my garden.
This is the result of an interaction with a very special lady here, known as @steemed-open 💜
If you enjoyed this post and like my writing, please follow me for more💜
😍😍😍
I guess this means u liked it?:]
yes, I liked it a lot. definitely the writing style of poetry I enjoy.
very inspiring comment, Thank you :] Before I would just save these to my desktop, but nice comments like this make me want to write more, have a great day! ;]
@aineyann is that you? You're Gorgeous!!!:)
Now I'm going to read the poem...
💜 Thank You Mister!!!!.. Yes that is me! & my most favorite dress where I feel most confident, no fear!💜
Lovely finish to your poem. You are a Very Talented Lady. Hold Your Head High and Slay Your Demons...
I am glad you like it, it was based on a conversation I had, became really stirred up to write this 🌠
Love love love!
a million thank you's for always checking my writing xxxx 🌹
Oh my word...I'm dumbfounded! This is amazing @aineyann. 🙏🏽 That first paragraph captures it so well. The drain. The colors fading. The light dimmed.. and you try to uncover the spark again, but once that delusion, fear, gets triggered you just have to wait out the beast. Eventually it tires and goes back to rest until next time...
But you speak of overcoming this beast! Actually not of beating it, but more profoundly of letting it go... that's brilliant and apt as problems that continue, like anxiety, usually have a component of need or some unconscious benefit that keeps us clinging to them in some way. Let it go...
"My last fear will be of my own strength." ❤️❤️❤️❤️
👆🏼That's my favorite line. 🤗🙌🏽
You are a beautiful soul, inside and out, and you are rocking the hell out of that little dress. 😉😘 mmmwah
Thank you hun! I began this last night , and was meant to continue it into today but it kept writing itself so I just let it happen!... very true.. it was about the beast 'sleeping'..., as I find it very hard to let go.. so easy to go back there wishing you could do a permanent erasing!.. < this is why you are so empowering!You've slayed the beast xxx
I am so pleased you enjoyed it especially the last line,fears worst fear, hehe x😘
I hope you have a wonderful day loveliness... today would be a perfect day to unwind to that glorious play you will be moving to soon!
positive thoughts, always 🙌
Hey now!!!!
(:
Beautiful and well done! Enjoyed!
Thank you for the boost! x 💜
Could you tell us the context of the poem?
Hi!:)
Basically , its about trying to fight the beast that is anxiety and panic ... by not giving it the strength/ power , making it worthless
Thanks for the question & reading my poem! Hope that helped!
Thanks for replying, makes total sense. Feel free to check my poems as well :)
"Let not your heart be troubled..." :^]
Thanks dear!!! :] blessings to u too :*
Congratulations! This post has been upvoted from the communal account, @minnowsupport, by aineyann from the Minnow Support Project. It's a witness project run by aggroed, ausbitbank, teamsteem, theprophet0, someguy123, neoxian, followbtcnews/crimsonclad, and netuoso. The goal is to help Steemit grow by supporting Minnows and creating a social network. Please find us in the Peace, Abundance, and Liberty Network (PALnet) Discord Channel. It's a completely public and open space to all members of the Steemit community who voluntarily choose to be there.
Just came back to this page, to once more start my day with your inspiring writing and have its intense, yet gentle wave carry me through, while I'm painting.
Strangely enough, I just noticed, that there is no comment from me already... getting old, I guess. Had a few "converstions" with you in my head, also inspired by the meaningful comments you left with my artworks...but chances are, you are not a mind reader and it might be a good idea, to leave a word or two...
You give such a vivid "picture" (for lack of a better word) of this theme, writing about emotions so compelling, that one can actually feel it all. Love that change of perspective (does that make sense in English?) and how you finally build this stairway towards the light!
Something about it reminds me of a dark time in my own life and one of the things that helped me find a way out, was "Psalm 23, The Lord is my shepherd". I'm not very religious, and that is the only one I know, but repeating it like a mantra all the time, finally pulled me out of my hole.
I realize, that following you isn't enough. Don't worry, I didn't decide to stalk you now.. thing is, once you follow a number of people, your feed is so full, that you can hardly keep up with it all. I have a folder with the URLs of my most favorite fellow steemians and I hope you don't mind, that I added yours.
Very beautiful Photo by the way, if I may say so.
Hello Kind Gentleman!!!,
I have just started on my steemit journey for today and have decided to start with this reply!!!..You know it always gives me great feelings of solace to know - that my poetry works harmoniously, with your art . It's like a prolific union :]
You got it in one, I like to bring darkness to my poetry- for some reason I find it flows better, both in my mind and within the arrangement of the words on paper ( or on screen!) - but always better when there is an exit in sight- the down and ups of life!
This is very peculiar that you have such a folder of 'bookmarked' blogs. I have just done the very same thing two nights ago, AND you were added to that list after your last art piece took my breath away!!
I look forward to visiting your blog in the next few moments , it's a means of deliberation for my own self=]
I await your latest gem! 🖌 🖌 🖌
Some smart person once said, great minds think alike! ...hehe... having the same idea with the favorites folder was only a question of time 😁
Just took a short break to check in on steemit and I have to admit, that I was really curious, if I might find a note from you. And... what a wonderful surprise, you were remarkably generous with kind words and inspiring thoughts. Thank you so very much!
It may take me a bit again, to reply adequately... have a deadline for a painting to be finished and I don't want to just write something in haste!
Not sure, how you feel about it, but if there is ever a painting that inspires you to write some poetry, we could do something together... of course I feel very inspired by your art as well, but for me to add a picture to the words would take a long time... it generally takes me many month from the idea to the finished painting... sometimes even years, and that might be a bit long for a cooperation.
Anyways, if there is something existing you like and find inspiring, please feel free to "borrow" it :-)
hello my friend =]
Thank you so much once again for your uplifting comments.
I am glad to hear that you are working hard... you did not mention if steemit has got you so dedicated in producing more and more divine works or if this been ongoing.
For me, I had been neglecting writing for a long time.. always there at the back of my mind , something I would 'return to' down the line.. but never crossing that line! ... Steemit was just what I needed!
I feel revived..knowing it's what I was meant to do. Now no regrets.
A collaboration in the future sounds like fun! I would totally be up for that... I know and understand what you mean about putting a time on it difficult, I have the same problem and worry about just going blank =)!
My newest one is short in script yet took the day! Some days are just like that and boy can it get frustrating!!!
I hope you are having a better run of it!