Keep writing mate!

It will continue to develop your style and flow. Play with language. Poems don't need to rhyme. Good or not good is subjective, the important thing is you are proud of your voice and that you are using it to say something that is true for you. You are tackling a range of really big social issues which, in my opinion (for what it's worth), is a wonderful use of your voice. You have some lines that really jump out at me and capture my imagination, and tickle my appreciation of language in a glorious way, for which I thank you!