Welcoming a Newborn
By some strange coincidence today's subject goes perfectly like some kind of continuation of my previous blog where I considered the possibility of relearning some of the basic knowledge you build the rest of your life on.
I am a firm believer that you can (and should) have a comfortable and full life, but I also consider some of the teachings that we have in early childhood can be restricting for us and the rest of our lives.
Today's subject was inspired with the series of events that led me to even think about it. It all started with a phone call from my brother, telling me that his wife is about to deliver their second child. With my heart filled with happiness I tried to be supportive and optimistic, encouraging my (worried) brother that it's all natural and that everything is going to be OK. But for some reason he kept saying things like:
"Life is cruel"
"Life is hard"
My initial reaction was "No, it's not". We shared almost the same life for quite some time, and I know how he lived and continues to live. It's not a perfect life, but we always had a home, family, health, love, food and even enough money, but his motto stays the same: "Life is hard". Let's say that he is nervous about the baby, and not himself. Let's transfer our focus on the subject I wanted to talk about, and that is the newborn itself. What will be the first thing he (it's a boy) will hear:
<"Welcome to life, it's hard?!"
I didn't like that idea, so I came to conclusion that maybe (if we had an opportunity) should say something else. Something like "User manual for life" (under the wild imagination that babies can understand us). I would say something like this:
"Dear child, welcome and let me explain to you the things I know about this place.
You are one of a kind, the odds of you being born as you are pretty small (about one in 400 trillion), so you are already a winner. The body you are in now is the body you are going to have for the rest of your beautiful life, so take good care of it. The life itself is going to be long and full of joys, but time limited, so use every moment of it wisely. If the problems do occur stay calm and learn from them. Be grateful that you have a chance to experience and learn, and be kind to those who are still in the process of adapting. This place we call home is beautiful, full of good people, animals, plants, colors, tastes, sounds and more. Take your time, and get to know as much of it as you can, and preserve it for the next generation. Like everything else, you are perfect just the way you are. As a matter of fact, we are all different and unique, accept people as they are, and you will be accepted too. Be brave, you already did the impossible, so you are able to everything, even when it doesn't look like that. Learn from others, and follow your intuition.
Lastly, try to see my advises as something helpful, not something written in stone. I am here longer, but that doesn't mean that I'm always right, I just do my best and so should you, until we learn more together."
Now, what would you say to newborns if they could understand you? Let's have fun in the comment section, and think of something clever for that next generation!
With love,
Tamara
What I wouldn't have given for an aunt like you to send me notes like that inside of a birthday card. The message is beautiful, positive, and above all, accurate. I grew up in religious household that taught that everything was predetermined and that this was only the beginning to an eternal life...not very conductive to a healthy, well-utilized opportunity to take a crack at this "living" stuff. I have hope that now that logic is (seemingly) making gains in the face of religion, generations will come to know that they can create the life that is right for them without hurting others.
I always like to share the message of skepticism and an internal locus of control to children and adults alike. It has too much of an impact on people's perceived happinesss to neglect and should be reinforced from an early time in life to raise strong, independent thinkers that may end up saving us from ourselves.
Such kind words, I really appreciate it!
I love when my blogs reach out to people, and at least make them think for a while!
Thank you for reading and leaving a comment, you are always welcome to come back!
Just try to keep me away ;)
To all newborns I would say the exact same thing I say to my daughter- "Life is short and wonderful, go and play, enjoy every moment of it, and leave Dad alone"- haha
Short and to the point, why not :)
P.S. Loved your last story, very well written!
If I could be his fairy godmother I would give him wisdom, as the most valuable gift and tell him to try to take the best from the bad situations.
So happy for you becoming an aunt.
I am excited too, can't wait to wish him welcome to the family!
Wow @tamacvet I LOVE this beautiful message here.
I've also had that thought "what if we had a user manual for life? What would that look like?"
While I feel your message is really pretty much perfect, here's mine:
"Hello there fellow being of love! Welcome to planet Earth. It's very different here than any other place you've ever been. Although it might be a challenge to learn the ropes, I promise you that you will. You see, in this place, we get the magical opportunity to experience life from a place of separation. Like, you actually can experience the world as if you were separate from it!. Isn't that such a cool thing? I know you're used to swirling around in the infinite all-ness, but here we get to experience what the separation of that is like. In a nutshell, there's lots of great things and not so great things. But I promise you this: the not so great things will teach you so much, and if you stay positive and appreciative of this experience every single day, I will promise you that you will love every moment of it! There's a lot more to say, but so little time, I'll let life explain the rest to you, for that's truly the best way to truly understand!"
Thanks so much for sharing this truly great and inspiring concept @tamacvet! I really enjoyed participating :)
Oh and I created a super fun and playful post today and I'd love to hear your thoughts about! It's right here if you're interested: 10 Highly Influential Things I Do Every Single Day [Part 2]
This is so lovely <3 It reminded me of this song
I try to sing it and play it (on youtube, of course, I am no musician) to my kids as often as I can. I really try to get it stuck in their head so, hopefully, when they grow up it would play in times of hardship.
I love it @big.mama, thank you!