Concept No. 10 - SCARS ON HER HEART {Collaborated}[Quotes + Poetry +Article] (Hindi/English)
All her life she suffers from
restrictions, sermons, judgements and taunts.
What's tragic is she does not quit,
when mostly her family is the biggest culprit !!
(The poetry below is in hindi LANGUAGE but the the DESCRIPTION below it is in ENGLISH.)
अत्याचार उस पर होता आया है,
पर इसका ज़िम्मेदार है अपना ही कोई,
न कि कोई पराया है ।
ये लड़ रही हैं जो पुरुषों से अपने हक़ के लिए,
नहीं जानती कि पुरुष तो खुद अनजान है,
कोई और ही है हकदार नारी के शोषण का,
पुरुषो पर लगा गलत ये इलज़ाम है ।
बाहर से देख कर अनुमान लगाने वालों.
ज़रा झाँक कर अंदर देखो,
उस दीमक को जो खोखला समाज को कर रही,
आँखों से अब ये पट्टी हटा कर फेंको ।
देखो, आखिर कौन था वो,
जिसने तुम्हे ये सब बताया था,
महिला है कमज़ोर और बेचारी,
ऐसा तुमको किसने सिखाया था ?
आती है याद एक औरत मुझे,
जो खुद सब कुछ थी झेल रही,
जिसने छोटा और नीचा अपने आप को स्वीकारा था ।
हाँ, मैं बात कर रही हूँ अपनी माँ कि,
जिसने बताया मुझे की लड़कियों को सब कुछ आना चाहिए,
जिसने कहा कि सिर्फ लड़कियों को ही खाना बनाना चाहिए
बताया कि लड़कियों का जीवन तो बस ऐसा ही होता है,
हमारा वक़्त जीने में कम, रोने में ज़्यादा खोता है ।
मुझसे ऐसे करवाई गई चीज़ें जैसे मुझे उधार कोई चुकाना हो,
जन्म लेना स्त्री का जैसे कोई आशीर्वाद नहीं,
पर ज़ुल्म कोई पुराना हो।
मानती हूँ मैं, कि पुरुषों का कोई भी दोष नहीं,
क्योंकि किसी पुरुष ने मेरे स्त्री होने का कभी मज़ाक नहीं उड़ाया,
कभी किसी ने मुझे कोई ताना नहीं कसा,
ना किसी ने मेरे नारीत्व को नीचा दिखाया ।
जिसने भी ये किया वो सिर्फ एक औरत थी,
हाँ वो मेरी माँ, मेरी सांस, मेरी बुआ, जैसी ही कई भोली सूरत थी ।
चाहे कितने मासूम हों चेहरे इन महिलाओं के,
पर ये ही वजह है जो ढोती आ रही हैं सदियों पुरानी उन परम्पराओं को,
क्योंकि मेरे भाई, मेरे पिता मेरे किसी दोस्त को इसकी भनक तक नहीं,
कुछ पता लगता ही नहीं उन बेगुनाहों को ।
उन्हें क्योंकि पूरा एश और आराम परोसा जाता है,
जिसके कारण सामर्थ्य उनका सो-सा जाता है,
कोई भेदभाव कहीं हो रहा है, उन्हें दिखता ही नहीं,
दर्द औरत का औरतों के बीच ही खो सा जाता है |
जब पुरुष कोई भेदभाव करते ही नहीं,
इसलिए ये नारीवाद उन्हें बकवास लगता है,
और अगर कोई करता भी है तो दोष उसका नहीं,
वो तो अपनी माँ के ऐसे ही रूप को देखता आया है ।
जब बचपन से उसने कभी खाना बनाया ही नहीं,
तो बीवी के आने पर भला वो क्यों बनाएगा?
जब बोझ परिवार का उसने कभी उठाया ही नहीं,
तो भला कैसे वो अपनी ज़िम्मेदारी निभा पायेगा ।
उसे निकम्मा खुद औरत बनाती है,
बेटे को कुछ कहती ही नहीं, बेटियों को बस सुनाती है,
अपनी ही सम्प्रदाय को औरत ने नचा रखा है,
औरत को औरत का सबसे बड़ा दुश्मन बना रखा है ।
सोचती हूँ में, आखिर कहाँ से ये शुरू हुआ होगा,
ये हमको मामूली वालों की टोकरी में डालना,
शुरू से तो न रहा होगा ।
उस वक़्त, जब इंसान को कोई होश नहीं था,
कुछ करने का उसमे कोई जूनून कोई जोश नहीं था,
जब इसी उधेड़ बन में वो बंधा था,
कि आखिर कौन है और कहाँ से वो आया है,
क्या उस समय से औरत को समझा सबने पराया है?
बात सीधी साधी सी है,
एक समय रहा होगा, जब पक्षपात ने जन्म लिया होगा,
और कुछ भी खुद-ब-खुद जन्मता नहीं,
तो रहस्य कोई,
यहाँ भी छिपा होगा ।
बनाने वाले समाज बनाकर चले गए,
और लोग उन रिवाज़ों की गलियों पर चलते गए,
किसी ने बड़ी सड़कों की तरफ कदम बढ़ाया ही नहीं,
ज़माने कितने गुज़र गए,
औरतों ने दिमाग अपना चलाया ही नहीं ।
पर खेल ये मर्द भी अच्छा खेल गए,
लड़कियों को उन्ही के खिलाफ खड़ा कर गए,
अपने लिए क्या आसान रास्ता ढूंढ डाला,
हम सबकी कमज़ोरी का सही फायदा उठा डाला ।
कमज़ोरी बस इतनी सी थी,
खुद से ज़्यादा चिंता हमें दूसरों कि थी,
इसलिए हम खुद को ही भूल गए,
और सबकी ख़ुशी के लिए किये गए हमारे प्रयास फ़िज़ूल गए ।
क्यों आखिर मुझे दर्जा नीचा इतना दे डाला,
जबकि तुझसे ज़्यादा क्षमता है मुझमे,
क्यों कमज़ोर का ठप्पा मुझपर छाप डाला,
जबकि सबसे ज़्यादा हिम्मत है मुझमे ।
हैरान हूँ में देखकर कि हम ज़िन्दगी को जन्म देने का इकलौता ज़रिया हैं,
फिर भी हर महीने जो खून हमसे बेहता है,
उसको देखने का गन्दा कितना तेरा नज़रिया है ।
क्या कुछ सहकर, वो चू तक नहीं करती,
फिर भी तू उसको नाज़ुक़ बुलाता है,
तुझे दिखता नहीं, या देखना नहीं चाहते,
इन्ही सवालों में, मेरा काफी वक़्त गुज़र जाता है ।
इतिहास कुरेद कर देखें तो साफ़ समझ में आता है,
हमको दबा डाला पुरुष ने,
अपने एहम को बचने के वास्ते,
पर समय बदला और लोग भी,
अब पुरुष नहीं, पर स्त्री ही खड़ी है नारी के रास्ते ।
पर जो हुआ सो हुआ,
अब बातें पुरानी उखाड़ने का मतलब नहीं कोई,
लेकिन जानना ये भी ज़रूरी था,
बातें ये आखिर कहाँ से शुरू हुई ?
भलाई इसमें है की अब हम जाग जाएं,
बरसों पुराने भेदभाव कि वजह हम हैं, ये जान जाएँ,
और पुरुषों पर इलज़ाम लगाना बंद कर दें
पहले खुद का सामना ही हम कर लें ।
अपनी बच्चियों को ज़िन्दगी झेलने का प्रशिक्षण देने की बजाए,
अपने बच्चो को उनका आदर करना सिखाएं,
सारा बोझ लड़किओं पर डालने की बजाये,
लड़कों को भी कुछ करना सिखाएं ।
लड़कियों को शादी के बाद के जीवन के लिए, बचपन से ही तैयार न करवाएं,
लड़कों को बचपन से ही बिगाड़ कर,
उसकी होने वाली बीवी कि बर्बादी का कारण न बनाये ।
सारा बोझ लेके कंधे अपने,
गलत उदाहरण न बने,
न सहें अत्याचार किसी का,
ना उसे पैदा करने का कारण बने ।
Description
Women have been the greatest victim of the society from centuries. Bearing pain, abuses, beating, tortures and so much more since long. Women have proved herself in all areas of life and she had fought way too many times, with too many people, but unfortunately, with the wrong ones !!
It sounds utterly stupid to me when woman blames all the men for being the reason of gender inequality. The men around me have always tried to win my heart ! I wonder where do they find those who degrade them for being a female ? How do they fail to see that men is not their enemy at all !!
By now, the intelligent ones must have understood whom am I actually pointing out here. Don't worry if you didn't. I treat everyone equal, no matter dumb or wise :p. Kidding !! So yes, the real enemy of woman is woman herself !! Well media too, but it is not the first one in the queue.
Wait what?
Harsh truth ! I know. But you can't stop reading this article without knowing WHY did I say so? So read on...
Do you remember who told you that the world is tough out there for women? Do you remember who told you that woman are weaker than men? Who taught you the MANNERS of being a woman, the need to be modest, polite, decent, delicate, elegant, graceful, shy and fragile? Who screamed at you for laughing like a man, for keeping your volume down, for not sitting with legs closed, for not wearing fully covered clothes, for not sitting PROPERLY, for not hiding it from everyone that you bleed every month? YES GIRLS !! It was your mother.
I must mention it here that things might occur in a slightly different manner where you live. Because the world is big and the culture everywhere is quite different, at some places, these things might not be true, though I am not sure. I would love to hear it from you guys if things happen the same way in your country as they happen in mine or if they are different?
But from a general perspective, this is what happens in the most places. Don't take me wrong, I love my mom but someone needs to speak the truth someday and the truth is that the greatest enemy of each one of you is your mother, your aunt, your grandmother and all your female relatives and family members.
But this is not a reason to whine. The real reason of concern is not who they are, but that they are not even aware about it !
Why else would it surprise you otherwise? Why weren't you already aware about it otherwise? It is because what is happening to you was what happened to your mother !! This is what happens with every lady and this is how we have been training our own gender TO BE A VICTIM from many generations ! I never came across a man who hurt my self esteem for being a woman. NEVER ! I have never seen a man saying it to a woman that they do not deserve something, just because their gender is feminine.
Even if there are people like such, I would still not blame it on them, but on their mothers and on all those woman whom he was surrounded by. Because the reality is, that the men are not even aware about it !
Men don't even know from where does this gender inequality evolved. Well obviously, they were not the one to give birth to it so how would they know? They were sitting there, watching television, lost in their phones and computers, playing cricket with their friends, teasing girls, finding ways to fulfill their sexual desires, enjoying their life while roaming around partying, working and earning, then spending it all to have more fun when suddenly - they get married !!
What do you think will happen now? Would they suddenly stop doing what they were doing from past 25 years? Hell no!!
On the other hand, what happens with girls meanwhile? They get trained, to prepare food, do the dishes, clean the house, to behave as per the manual of GOOD GIRLS by sitting, eating, talking, laughing, walking, sleeping, dreaming PROPERLY ! The girls get prepared and trained for marriage since they take birth. Marriage with whom? With THAT GUY who was watching television and enjoying whole his life. Then you say that marriages these days are not working out. Hello ? Where is the logic?
Would you still say that boys are to be blamed here? Or that woman who on one hand prepares her boy to DESTROY and on the other hand trains her daughter to REPAIR. Inequality is created every moment in every house. It is not what a woman faces after she leaves her home. We are the one to create it and to spread it and it's high time that we need to stop blaming others for it.
How did it all began?
Men aren't the ones to be blamed right now, but no doubt they were the ones to create it all in the beginning. I admit it is quite intelligent of them to mold things in such an amazing way, to build a strategy to turn woman against their own gender and continuing it for centuries, that too without even letting anyone know, what in the system is actually wrong. Amazing !! Applaudable I must say. I still won't blame men. They did what was correct for them. They used woman to the best possible interest of theirs. I won't even fight against them, because I can't, well they don't exist anymore. LOL.
The men right now aren't even aware about it but I don't envy those who created these strategies. They did what was best for them but women did not !!! They are still carrying those old-fashioned, out dated slogans and taking them so damn seriously and following it with dedication. Somebody please wake them up man !!
Well I don't know if women are dumb or not. May be those ancient men killed all the intelligent ladies and pushed this practice of inequality further from the remaining dumb ladies for generations !! I don't know, anything is possible. Because if all women were dumb, they would not have been showing such amazing performances in every field of life !! Sometimes, even better than men !!
Conclusion
Now, when you know who your real enemy is, it is tougher than before. It is easy to go out and fight with others but it is tough to fight with our own selves !! Opposing your mother, your family members and relatives won't be easy. Opposing society, won't be easy ! Telling someone that their belief is extremely idiotic and illogical, is throwing yourself in front of a tiger, especially when they are elder than you and live at your place.
But the only way you can help yourself is by changing yourself first. Realizing first that it's your own clan who is the culprit here is very important. Afterwards, you will have to speak up, A LOT. Because this inequality will be faced on every step, we need to stand for ourselves everyday in every situation. It would take years to make it happen but if we continue, I am sure a day will come when mothers would not ask their daughters to keep their volumes down but to laugh loudly, from their heart. All the best.
Are things different at your place? Do you still think men should be blamed for all the pain of woman? What are your views about it. Don't forget to mention it all in the comments below !!
All pictures are from pixabay.com, except the first one, which is by Lin Yung Cheng and the second last one which is by Anniegien. Quotation on BOTH these images by :- @himshweta
wow this posts deserves much more, i have given you my 100% vote because it is really well written and i enjoyed reading it from this side. I think its all about educating new generation now and making sure eveyrone is more of a team rather than solo in something. When you have a partner, you should be working as a team and doing everything together, not only its more fun but its fair and makes it better! thanks for sharing!
Thank you dear for the huge upvote !!
The concept of being in a team is important for people to understand. All their life they behave as if life is a struggle when they behave as individuals. Life would be beautiful if all thought of each other as a team 🙂
Thanks for your comment 😀
Very insightful and well-written piece! It gives us much to think about, there is no doubt. Thank you for sharing this viewpoint with us, and I will certainly be pondering it! 100% upvote!
Thanks kittygirl. I am glad you were able to understand. I was kicked out of the Teamgirlpowa discord group because of this post.
Seems like the admin of the group couldn’t understand my viewpoint and thought that I am against supporting girls. But waking women up so that they can see the clear picture and then take a stand for themselves is my way of supporting girls.
Thanks for understanding and appreciating it. It means a lot :)
Only those who have lived in India know with certainty what life is like there, and I realize you are reporting from your perceived experiences. I believe that many women — some knowingly, and some unknowingly — sabotage the rights of themselves and other women. But, I also believe that women are not the only culprits today, as many men also still speak against womens' rights. In my thinking, some women AND some men are culpable for the state of things today — no single gender, religion, or culture shoulders the blame alone.
I applauded your writing in my earlier comment because it certainly gives us things to consider, whether one subscribes to those beliefs in the end, or not. But, I definitely believe that your idea holds some merit, no doubt. It is ONLY by considering other viewpoints in a serious manner that we learn and grow as human beings. To do otherwise is to become stagnant in our thinking and that stifles growth. Namaste!
One of your best works.
The change starts within us, and when we have changed ourselves enough, we will change the world one day too.
You know what's wrong with the society, then you will change things for better one day through your words.
Words have enough power to change the world.
Keep going on, you are doing great.
I believe no one can change the world but if we be successful to even change a few people around us, I believe that would be enough !!
Everyone if starts to try making an effort to bring the change, there would be enough changes happening in the world.
Glad to see you enjoyed my writing :) Thanks a lot for ur support :)
welcome.
Very interesting post, I hear you, when you talk about how as women we can be our worst enemies, asides from the media that is. We are living in a time where a lot of women, instead of building one another up are tearing at one another, being bitchy and judgemental, adding to the pressure that society has already put on women to be able to do everything.
Coming from Ireland, we have had a long history of having a matriarchal society, the last one in Europe. That all changed with the arrival of the Celts and later the church, which saw feminine power as a threat.
To me It is all about bringing people together. As women we need to come together, hold space and support one another. This huge imbalance in the world is because woman/ femininity has been undervalued. The view that the word has over nature has a huge part to play in this, this dominance that people have over the earth, believing they can do and treat the earth anyhow they want, as it is here for them, this brought an age of ownership and dominance.
I am so glad you understand this !
This opinion of mine in this post has suffered a lot of criticism and that too by girls again !! 🤦🏻♀️
See that’s what I was talking about. I made such a lengthy post for them to understand and they were arguing with me for writing such a thing.
I have been recently kicked out from a discord server named as “teamgirlpowa” because the admin believed that I DO NOT support women. I wonder where and why did she get an idea like this from my post.
I am so touched that there are women like you who do understand my words and appreciate it.
Thanks a lot dear :)
Amazing post, I read it all with interest, it captured me:)
I live in a country that says it's the most equal country in the world. And it might be... Still I find the same things that you mention here and also the blaming. Girls aren't good at sticking together, they stab each other in the back whenever they can. They work so hard for their looks, who putted that demand on them (us)? Mostly other women... Once again: great post, nice to read!!
Yeah that’s another point that I missed !! Thanks for adding it !!
We all put makeup to look better. Why? Men don’t do it then why should we? We are beautiful the way we are! We go to saloon every month!! Why? Because we ourselves ask other women that why haven’t you done your eyebrows, why didn’t you wax , we laugh at others if they don’t fill the standards of looking beautiful all the time!!
Why?
I am glad you could understand:) thanks a lot :)
And then There are other women, who kicked me out of a women based discord server because this post gave her signs that I don’t support women 😑😒
M happy that there are women like u also who understand:)
I like it
I agree completely. The ego of man is the birth of pain and inequality. Our world has learned this lesson many times over. Is the death of ego truly
possible?
Yes it is !! I have tried to kill it , and it has gradually decreased, not dead yet but if it’s degradation is possible, its death is also pretty much possible as well.
It's very true that change has be yourself before expecting change of the world.
Thanks dear
Very nice work dear you are improving day by day,best of luck for your next post :)
THanks to u for your support!!
क्या बात है , अच्छा लिखा आपने
Thanks for reading :)