The habit of creating good habits...

Every human builds habits. I'm not sure on the psychology of it but I think it's a pre-programmed thing we all have. We are "creatures of habit" a saying that get's applied to people all the time. We drink the same sort of coffee, eat the same sort of foods, wear a similar style of clothing, like a certain type of person as a partner, dress in the same order, fold our arms in the same way...You get the idea. We are habitual creatures mostly. Sure, sometimes we break out of those habits, but most stay safely within their habitual boundaries and are content to do so. But should we? Break out I mean.

Let's apply it to the habit of embracing negativity and laying blame on other's for our own lack of progression, reward and job-satisfaction in the workplace. Some may relate.

I don't mean you of course...You'd never do such a thing...I mean someone else who whinges and whines about why everyone excels except them, why they don't earn as much income as the next person, why their office is smaller or why they aren't as productive for instance.

That person, let's call him Mr. Blame, arrives exactly on time each day, (or late, but never early) and is disgruntled about the fact others are there and working already calling them idiots.

He turns on his computer then heads off to the kitchen to make a coffee then returns to his shitty cubicle-work-station to check Facebook for LIKES.

He then procrastinates about getting started on the task of searching for new business but is easily distracted by a conversation between two top-performers about their successful deal from yesterday.

He feels demotivated by their success and procrastinates some more. He thinks, "I'd be more successful if the boss didn't hate me and gave me more leads like those two assholes."

And then he checks Facebook for LIKES on the post he put up about the Simpsons Episode he watched last night...

Lunch time starts a few minutes early, and he takes that opportunity to trash-talk his (successful) colleagues to others from the office attempting to devalue their efforts and results.

He gets back from lunch several minutes late, checks Facebook for LIKES and then gets back to work...After checking what time The Simpsons is on TV that night, and googling some funny meme's.

Around mid-afternoon Mr. Blame get's passionate about how he doesn't get as many opportunities as the others in a conversation with the boss and also takes that opportunity to start some rumours about the two top-performers being late back from their lunch break...

He makes a phone call to a potential client but they are not interested in his services and so, because calling clients "just doesn't work", he decides to put a post on Facebook promoting his services to his network instead of pushing on with some more calls.

The next hour is spent watching his phone for LIKES and then it's home time...Well, it will be in an hour but he has to shut his computer off and get ready to leave so, being the productive guy he is, he starts that process early.

Sound like anyone you know? Not you of course...Someone else.

Ok, so there's a habit of blame and negativity, of victim mentality and of expectation/hand-out ethos. Was Mr. Blame born this way? No. Is it productive? No. Does it show ownership, responsibility, work-ethic and drive? No. Is it negative, irresponsible, and un-productive to Mr. Blame's life? Yes of course. And the big question...Can he change his ways; Change his habits? Yes, certainly he can. Will he? Who knows...

Some people have destructive habits, habits that their lives depend upon and of course some that don't really make much difference to their lives at all such as what sock they pull on first. But productive people create good habits; They determine what those sorts of habits are and actively pursue them. Habits can be hard to break, no doubt, but they are actually quite easy to create. One simply needs to do the given thing daily, repeatedly and within a few short weeks (some say 21 days) BOOM, you have a habit. Obviously I mean good habits right?

So here's a few good habits to think about...These are a few of my own.

• Gratitude: Wake and be grateful for it, for what you have in life like your health, your partner, your family, job, safety...Everything.
• Never criticise, condemn and complain: Yeah I know...This one is HARD. I don't hit this one 100% of the time but I try. Blaming, denigrating, tearing others down and making them feel bad about themselves and other such stupidity may give a person a momentary feeling of power but it's a slippery slope and one that doesn't lead to happiness. The habit of avoiding the three C's is a valuable habit.
• Responsibility and Ownership: These two things are game-changers if deployed with regularity and conviction. Taking the ownership for your own actions, reactions, success and failure is liberating, positive and productive.
• Be humble: Never confuse humility for weakness. It is, in fact, a strength. It demonstrates a person's ability to do what's required without fanfare, reward and accolade and to simply get on with things. That's what gets results, not trophy hunting, searching for LIKES as such. Be humble in defeat and success.
• Passion: Being passionate means you engage with things better. Your partner, job, sport, friendships, negotiations, health, conversations and so on. It means that the plethora of other elements required for success in life will come more easily. They all sit secondary to passion.
• Get after it: This is a great habit. It means to pursue the desired result, to make it happen. What is IT exactly though? Well anything that positively affects your life. Sitting back and waiting for things to roll out won't help them roll out effectively. Proactivity trumps reactivity. Every time.
• Show respect, courtesy, kindness and generosity: These things are a non-negotiable to all humans, and yet how many people live their lives by them? Again, these things don't make a person look weak, they make them look strong. Having good manners, being a gentleman for instance, is a strength in a world where so many are not.

There's many ways to deploy the above habits; Millions of ways in every situation a person finds themselves in. The important thing though is to actually do them. To layer them one over the other until little by little these things become intrinsic to a persons' makeup. Habits.

It would be easy to be Mr. Blame and make it everyone else's fault that success hasn't been achieved. The victim mentality may even gain some initial benefit despite it's negative nature however the further one goes the more that negativity will grow like a cancer. It becomes one of those bad habits that can be so hard to break and will bear no fruit.

It's a little like a tree...Give it no water, sunlight or nutrients and it will wither and die. Feed yourself negativity, lay blame, take no responsibility or ownership and the same will happen.

Feed the tree with the right nutrients, water and sunlight and it will sprout leaves, flowers and bear fruit. A bountiful harvest. Feed yourself positivity through good habits and the same result will ensue. It's not difficult...It comes down to habit: The habit of creating good habits.

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