Only one life

Here's me...Unremarkable, at least visually, and probably in other ways as well. I'm just a normal sort of person with normal-person faults and frailties. I do things right and wrong, make monumental mistakes, have experienced failure and have had huge successes providing a counter-balance to those failures. I'm not tall or short, smart or stupid, rich or poor...I'm just...Well, I'm just me.

Today I turned 49 years old and whilst I don't feel old I certainly feel like a fair chunk of life has passed me by. I'm pleased, proud in fact, to say that when I look back on my life there's not much I observe with regret. Sure, there's a couple of things I regret, and wish I could change, but I can't of course; I can only change the future so in respect of those things I regret...I've deployed change to ensure I don't have to revisit the regret all over again. Smart right?

I've been with my partner, my wife Faith, for over 63 percent of my entire life, 31 years in total. Throughout our lives together we've experienced highs and lows, success and failure just like most people and have dealt with each in the best way we knew how at the time. Obviously, having been together for so long, the manner in which we handle things now is different to when in our teens or late twenties although I'd like to think that in any of our decision-making we made wise (based on our understanding at the time) decisions. I think we did. We're still together and are managing to get through life so I think we've done ok. We've had a great life so far in truth.

You see, that's what turning 49 made me think today...About getting through life and the future of it...Life. It's probably not the right wording, "getting through," as we feel like we enjoy life pretty well so maybe I should say my birthday made me think about the enjoyment of life.

Each person's life is only ever going to be what they make it and the enjoyment one person finds may have no value to another. It's personal and often unique to the individual although we tend to enjoy similar things in life I suppose. I've worked towards creating a fulfilled life, one without regret and that I can be proud of. I'm confident I've succeeded in the main. No, I'm not perfect and so there's been moments however generally my life is one I can be proud of.

Moving forward into the future though...Who has any clue?!

I have the ability of hindsight when I look backwards but the future...The next 49 years? It's all pretty indistinct really.

My wife and I plan around future scenarios and the desired outcomes we would like to see happen however as I say all the time, "no plan survives contact with the enemy" meaning the best laid plans can fail and rarely play out as intended. Some flexibility needs to be built in, contingencies strategised and fall-back's determined.

At the same time as looking to the future the only moment we truly know we have is the one in which we are at this very point in time; That means living for now is also very important, at least as important as planning for the future. Faith and I tend to settle on a comfortable balance of both and hold to a few life-ethos-rules that seem to have worked over the years.

I used to sign off my blog with the following phrase and stopped for some reason. A friend of mine reminded me of it a couple of days ago in a chat, thanks @honeydue, and I've decided I'm going to reinstate it. The phrase goes like this.

"Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default."

It's a pretty simple phrase but holds a profound meaning to those who understand what it means to them and how it can impact quality of life for themselves and everyone close to them. In a nutshell it means:

Eliminate ego, hubris, selfishness and meanness of spirit. It means that humility and kindness are more valuable than narcissism and that ownership of one's attitude, actions, success and failure provides better value than blame and negativity. The design and create ethos requires effort and responsibility.

It's a powerful phrase once one understands it's concepts and to be honest has been a big factor in my life keeping me on-track living my ideal life and planing the future.

So, the next 49 years...I'll be 98 in 49 years from now and I managed to find the image above of what I will look like. You might think I look weird but fast forward 49 years and everyone will look like this...Maybe. The year will be 2068 and life will look a lot different than it does today, just in the same way it was vastly different in 1970 when I was born. What won't change is my desire to live a life of my own creation, just as my wife and I have done in the past. The alternative...Well, it's just not really life in our opinion; Not ours anyway, it would be someone else's right?

So, no I don't have too many regrets from my 49 years of life and moving forward work towards being able to say the same. What each of us do with the life we are allotted is our own business. If you're one who likes to float through it drifting on the tide of other people's decisions and actions and accepting that as your own life...Well, that's your prerogative. For you others? Well, start designing and creating and get after life as if it's the only one you have!

Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default - @galenkp

P.s. If anyone wants to hit me up on Discord: @galenkp#9209