Parenting 101: Positive Approach
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"Train up a child in the way he should go , and when he is old he will not depart from it . "
~Proverbs 22:6
This was my favorite memory verse since my childhood days. Luckily I am that I learned it during my preschool days, well guess what because this is our school verse. I was so blessed because until now that I have my own family I used this verse as my guide in parenting my kids. Some of us parents, do forget to control our temper when we are mad with our kids. Let us be true to ourself, frankly speaking I am also loosing my temper especially that I have three naughty boys, but how would you handle such behavior / tantrums of your kids.
In the Philippine setup parents were very disciplinarian they used slippers or sticks for spanking, they were trying to pinch the sides of their kids thigh, during old times they let their kids kneel on stack of salts or Mongo beans, but it was before I dont if there are still parents who give punishments such like this. Try to do it now haha!😁 I bet you your kids will tell you they can send you to jail😅kidding aside, those kinds of disciplinary actions could be avoided and could be substitute with what we called Positive Reinforcements.
We as parents we should consider a lot of things when disciplining our kids. Here are follows:
▪First we need to focus on the false action of your kids not with the kid itself.
Consider his wrong action correct it right away through verbal reprimand , explain in the most simplest way you can. Remember you are his parent, you must teach your kids between a good and bad actions.
▪Second show your child true nature.
You needed to distinguished right away where did your child imitate the wrong action that he did. Then explain again in the most easiest way that your child would understand that he must not do the same thing. Ok! let me give you a good example for this never say to your child don't do it again because your ordering your child ti so it again. Why is that so? Because that last word will keep to his mind which is do it again, but instead say it in a positive way like "I will not do the same thing again".
▪Lastly, do not be so hard with your kids , do not used your hands for hurting them.
Always remember parents caring hands", your hands were use to take care of them to hug them, to squeeze them with your tender loving care, to caress their hair, to hold their hands, to touch their face and massage their body, it is not used for hurting them. I bet you it will also lower their self-esteem and that would be too bad for them.
As a parent I have three rules inside our home for my kids and I would like to share this to you guys, most especially to some of the parents out there it might help you.Here they are:
▪First, kids loved to play. If your kids wanted to play their toys let them be, somewhat you are the one who bought those toys right? Toys are for playing and not for displaying. Let your kids play with them but have a strict rule they will be the one to keep it if they will not keep it, locked it on a canister for a weeks or a month to serve as a punishment for not following your instructions. I'm telling you they might not do the same thing again.
These are their last toys left for them to play! Everything is locked up! Hahaha.
▪Second tip, mealtime was the most complicated job for us. Trained them to eat what is on the table explain to them that everything they see on your dinning table are blessings from Jesus. That it was good for them to eat it because it will make you happy, make Jesus happy and guys trick them that they will become strong like their favorite superheroes and good-looking like their favorite actors or actress.
Pick up jokes for them to enjoy their food and Never</> forget to join them while eating, be with them, have time for your kids even if you are to busy because you will be their role model for doing what is right.
▪Third tip , do not let them used gadget excessively. Give them specific time on when can they used their gadgets. Give them a task that will consume their time and have a lesser time using their gadget. Give them a checklist of task for a week (specifically for 5 days or during school days ) if they accomplished the task they can used their gadget for a day as a reward system.
▪Lastly, always complement your kids. Praise the small things they did alone. If you want you can give them a small reward for doing such good deeds. A simple praise like "Good job!", "Great!" "Thank you I love you", means a lot to them.
They recieve Kinder Joy from their Dad because of following my instructions for the whole day. Good job kuya's!
Parents never forget that once in your life you become kids also, although you disciplined differently by your own parents think twice if your going to follow the traits or create your own ways on how would you train your child positively. Always remember that training your child as early of their age you are getting them acquire the mastery of good deeds they need to learn through the rest of their life. Again I am not here to summoned you guys, instead I am just sharing my thoughts as a preschool teacher, SPED (special education with special needs) teacher, a friend and most especially as one of you. Had to say goodbye my kids already calling me for our breakfast. Hahaha! Chao! 🤗😉
Note: Everything that is written above are the things I've learned as an educator and as a parent.
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