Why are some people still shocked to meet Stay-at-Home-Dad?
Have any of you stay-at-home moms out there ever been asked if you were babysitting your own children? I have. One day while we were at the park, I had an older woman ask me if I was babysitting my kids. I told her I take care of them every day. She asked if I cooked and cleaned as well. She seemed to be shocked when I said yes and I also do the food shopping and pretty much everything else around the house. On another occasion, while at the chiropractor with my two kids, I told another older woman I was a stay-at-home-dad. Her response was, “That’s what used to be called a stay-at-home mom.”
My interactions with stay-at-home moms are also vastly different. Some moms out there are incredibly welcoming and willing to talk, set up play dates, and become friends, but others wouldn’t even consider setting up a play date with my kids because I stay home with them, because I am a man. And I can sense the uneasiness they have around me.
Why does this still happen? Why, in 2018, is it a problem for some people that I stay home and take care of my children as a dad? As a family, this is what worked best for us. Could I go to work? Sure, but why? If I go to work, what do I gain? I would get paid to spend time away from my children, while paying someone to take care of my children, so I can put more money into savings and retirement. I understand there are cases where people want to continue with their professional careers and others that don’t want to stay home with their kids all day every day, which is understandable. It isn’t easy, and that’s putting it mildly. Just before James was born, I was at a point where I would have been starting a new career, and it didn’t really make sense for me to do that. Don’t get me wrong, I definitely have days that I feel like it would just be easier to go to work and not handle two toddlers all day. Also, anyone out there that thinks being a stay-at-home mom or dad isn’t work hasn’t done it themselves, and would likely be in for one hell of a shock.