I remember and still hearing this often, "You're going to spoil your child!" But how do you spoil your child?
When I gave birth, it was just normal to lift my baby when she's crying or when breastfeeding. But those around me would always say, "Just let her cry for a moment!", "Don't lift her up too often!", "After breasfeeding set her down!" Because they say I'm going to spoil the baby.
No. You cannot spoil an infant! Infants cry when they need something and they're not trying to manipulate us. Imagine them 9 months into the womb so safe and sound and then suddenly they were out. Everything was different and they were confuse and scared. And so during this stage of infancy, you really need to build that safe place they used too. And those warm cuddles where she can hear your heartbeat will give her that comfort.
The answer is No. They are advancing and tantrums are simply a part of normal development. I can say toddlers' tantrums are the most challenging for parents especially for me. I'm over the moon when she's just happily playing and feel helpless when she started to scream or cry endlessly.
She's having tantrums when I say "No!" But I learn that, that's a good thing! Coz I'm giving her the boundaries of what is acceptable and not. I made her learn. We fallout most of the times. Sometimes we may avoid to say no because we don't want our child to fallout with us. And I'm somehow guilty of that. I'm too soft sometimes that I need to call her Dad to tell her No and she won't! And I thought, here comes the "Bad Daddy/ Good Mummy" thing. But no It's not like that, It's only in my mind. She listens better to her Dad and behaved well when he's around. Slowly, I'm trying to be more firm while still offering her tender loving care.
One thing I noticed when we fallout and I not try to fix her up or stop her tantrums, she comes to me more sweeter. I hug her and would hug me tighter and kissed me nonstop. See? Tantrums brings us closer!
So to summed up, toddlers whose having tantrums aren't spoiled! It just means they are advancing. And that she's 2.
So if infant and toddler aren't spoiled how do you tell if your child is?
I have a 7 year old son remember and I say he is spoiled.
5 SIGNS THAT HE IS SPOILED
If we are in shop and he sees something that he wants and not get it, he will be lying down in the floor crying at the top of his lungs and kicking about. In short throwing tantrums.
Eating time. He won't eat what's in the table and will request something else.
He won't share anything to others especially his toys.
He tries to control adults wanting them to listen to him at all times and what to do what he says. Bossing around.
When I need to bribe him with material things for him to do tasks.
As a mother I want to give my child everything they want and even it looks like I'm spoiling them it is often out of the best of intentions.
Wanting to give my children everything without their having to work for it. Which doesn't work in real world so I tried my best not to spoil but reward them. Make them do tasks and reward them instead of just giving what they want.
I learned that being firm and strict not label you as bad mummy. A no means no. And toddler gonna learned that too! I still spoil them but I'm spoiling them with lots of love now!
There are spoiled children then!
HOW ABOUT YOU? HOW DO YOU SPOIL YOUR CHILD?
Vote for witness!
Please visit https://steemit.com/~witnesses and consider voting for @steemgigs for @surpassinggoogle as your witness and other witnesses @precise, @cloh76.witness, @patrice, @themarkymark, @ausbitbank. Thank you.
i believe that you clearly knows the best thing for your children. i guess when i become a parent too someday, I need to be firm and let him/her know his boundaries too at an early age like 3 or 4. i just dont know if i could do it because i have a soft heart for children too😆
You just call your husband too @enjieneer. They are always the Mr. Right. Have the Keep the baby right attitude! 😊
There is some great research on the brains of children 0-6 years. Bruce Lipton's book Biology of Belief goes into this research- great book BTW. Kids 0-6 years are actually in a hypnotic state. Everything they see and hear goes into their brain like a recorder. This becomes the subconscious. That is why we can have irrational fears as adults and not know (remember) where it came from. a THOUGHTLESS COMMENT MADE BY A TRUSTED ADULT TO A 5 YEAR OLD CAN HAVE LIFELONG EFFECTS. "You are ugly, You are worthless"....etc. I agree with this post- you cannot spoil a child. Give them all the love and encouragement you can. Tell them they are wonderful and listen to them. Some Tibetan writings teach the importance of listening to children closely and to never ridicule them--- they are closer to God and fresh from God. Listen and know they are truth incarnate- unspoiled and pure.
Your kids are beautiful and your thoughtfulness makes you a great Mom!
Aww this is sweeet! Thank you love.
I will remember this! Appreciate your comment dear. ❤
Cute kids! :)
I can't really talk about this topic but I think it is never a good decision to let a baby cry over a long time.
I think a young baby needs to know that there is a loving mother/father who cares about them. They feel this.
Otherwise they feel insecure
Yes agree especially babies. Don't deprieved them the cuddling and baby the baby thing. I know every parents have their own ways and know the best for their babies.
When you become a Dad you can tell me more lol. Cheers!