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RE: On parenting, drugs and suicide…
My mother was a narcissist / borderline. And I didn't know that until I was 40. To me, that was "normal". Yes, being emotionally dead was normal.
I am glad that I didn't have many relationships, as I could seriously hurt people by not knowing (as in, not knowing they exist and that they are important) their emotions. (as in, I am really good at taking care of plants and animals, but a human is neither of those)
So, thank you very much for your story.
Yes, it is strange, isn't it? If someone else had that character fault you would immediately have noticed. But somehow it is very difficult to recognize these things in your parents.
Thanks for sharing.