Steemit Open Mic Week 48 - Jagged Lines (Original Song)

in openmic •  6 months ago

Jagged Lines

Let me draw down
A few jagged lines
I'm just sick of running circles
In my mind

Oh I love you
What have I done
From miles apart into your arms

There's a fireball
Under my skin
And it's ancient, it's a sonnet
Digging in

Oh I love you
I have from the start
From miles apart into your arms
From miles apart into your arms

I don't always say everything right but
All of the seasons that we brush aside into one
We don't always know when everything ripe falls
Bending our knees to fill our bags before they're gone
Just let it all go into the nightfall
Sending our bottles to the waves in rising tide

From miles inside this old man's heart
From miles inside this old man's heart
From miles inside this old man's heart
Miles inside this old man's heart

Authors get paid when people like you upvote their post.
If you enjoyed what you read here, create your account today and start earning FREE STEEM!
Sort Order:  trending

Way to go with the authentic “garage-band” setting… It’s perfect for Open-Mic – and so is your song! Excellent guitar, vocals, melody, lyrics, and performance! Great job Brian – really… I loved this!

These are just great lyrics man, and they give a lovely melody to this piece. Sweet changes too. Also, that is a nice guitar man! Lowden is it?

·

Thanks! It's a Langejans, although I'd love to get my hands on a Lowden one of these days :)

·
·

I've never heard of them but yours sounds top! :-)

nice performance. I enjoyed it. Vote for curie as a witness :)

Music is also important factor for life.very nice and thanks for sharing.

Beautiful post, nice song :) Thanks for sharing, good luck n' #keepsteemin !

palmidrummer 17 in spanish
Hello!!!
Welcome to steemit.com I am @palmidrummer . Steemit community has the power to change our life if we simply upvote and follow each other. I joined steemit for a cause of helping my students.
Please follow and upvote me ( @palmidrummer )and I will do the same for you.
Thankyou, and please chek me previous post....... porfavor ayudame con upvotos y lo hare contigo

Another great song man! I would use that as soundtrack for a roadmovie!

Well done Brian! What a beautiful entry.

Love the 6/8 pattern you got going. The lyrics really match the feel of the guitar. I really like the lines:

We don't always know when everything ripe falls
Bending our knees to fill our bags before they're gone

To me it seems to hint at one of life's greatest challenges. To pick up fruit before it is ripe is often what inhibits us from trying. But without bending our knees, we will never be able to pick up any fruit at all so might as well bend away even if we aren't ready/don't think we're ready.

·

Thank you my friend. I have some apple trees and I thought of this line, what you described fits exactly with what I was going through when I wrote this.

👏👏👏👏👏 Geat sound of sincerity in your voice which is accentuated beautifully by your guitar playing. Nice one mate. Thanks for sharing. 👍

Nice man!, really good songwriting and performance :)