CAUSES OF HEARTBREAK IN RELATIONSHIPS: HOW TO AVOID IT

Great Minds,

So, I have heard a lot about heartbreak, and I have seen and also helped to console/ advised /encouraged people who were heartbroken. In fact I was almost heartbroken, let's say I was at the brink of it before I was helped and got over it swiftly. You may not know the pain, shall I say the agony involved. The result of heartbroken is grave, ranging from minor health issues, hatred for the opposite gender to suicide and other terrible consequences especially when it is ill managed. Hence, it is important we know the causes with a view to avoiding it or forestall future occurrence. This article seek to explain what heartbroken is all about, it causes as well as how to guide against it especially among the youth.

Source: Google image

WHAT DOES IT MEANS TO BE HEARTBROKEN?

"Heartbreak according to Wikipedia is "a term used to describe the intense emotional and sometimes physical stress or pain one feels at experiencing great longing". It is often used to point to the searing pain of a failed relationship.
Heartbreak can also means crushing grief and anguish often due to the pains and strains of love. Heartbreak really can hurt the human heart. It is one of the greatest suffering one can go through. A lot of us have experience it one way or the other. Many have heard words like "may be we should just be friends " or "it is not you". These words just popped up when the going seemed so sweet and intense with a partner. Like I said earlier it can be so devastating and frustrating that it can lead to some extreme conditions like madness and suicide if not well managed.

Well, like I stated earlier, let's look at the core cause of this heartbroken with a view to avoiding it if possible.

CAUSES OF HEARTBROKEN

It is important to note that there are different cause factors and peculiar to each relationship. That is to say the reasons for breakups in relationships varied with one love party to the other. While there are many different reasons people breakup that result in heartbroken, it is factual to state that there are some basic and very common causes of breakup and consequently heartbreak especially known and prevalent with young people. These are highlighted below;

Inability to define the relationship from the beginning:
Most of the failed relationships that lead to heartbreak were fundamentally designed to fail. When starting a relationship, it is important you define the relationship, it's limit and where it will end. A young man may enter a relationship without the intention of marriage, while the lady involved in such hook, may be thinking and concluding marriage. If this is not well defined from the beginning, with time when the obvious will be irresistible, there is bound to be an heartbreak. The same goes to the ladies, a lady may decides to go into a relationship just for protection, to have someone to keep her comfortable for the moment or to pay her bills without necessarily having mind of marriage, while the young man involved may be concluding in his mind yes I have found my missing rib. Suddenly he proposes and she said no "let just be friends ". This to me is a major cause, you see while in some cases, a partner may muster the courage to define it to the other his limits and what he wants but the initial attractions and love at first sight will override his or her judgement only to regret later when it's too late.

Way forward it is therefore important you discuss your relationship when entering it. That is define the boundaries and strive to stay within them or decline going into it if the conditions did not suit you. It is better not to start than to enter deep and crash hard.

Lack of Commitment and Understanding and immaturity:
Relationships require commitment from both partners. There will be a breakup if overtime only on partner is committed, most times when it is newly started, the dearth of commitment from one will not be obvious and therefore be ignored coupled with the initial attractions. But overtime this becomes so open and perhaps they must have gone far deep. This is capable of wiping out the initial intentions and love.
Additionally, it is possible to remain and work out the differences if there is understanding and maturity. Absence of those can lead to heartbreak .

Immediate Gratification
Some young people go into relationships not because they are in love. In fact some are fully aware that they are not ready for committed relationship but because they want to satisfy the body filled with lust, failed to give it a thought before entering it. All they wanted was to have sex with the other person or to make money from the opposite sex
and can go to any length to achieve that without minding the consequences including the use of deceit and fake promise of marriage.

In view of the above, it is advisable you learn the act of self-control and always think before you act. Think of the consequences on the other partner and on you after the act. Be true to yourself and communicate your intentions and limits clearly to one another before entering into a relationship.

In Conclusion, it is obvious that heartbreak is a searing pain that most people suffer in failed relationships and it can lead to depression, frustration and other mental illness including suicide.
It is also noteworthy, that there are several factors that can result in relationships breakup that causes heartbreak. But this post summaries all into three major headings which
include inability to define a relationship from beginning, lack of commitment and immaturity and immediate gratification of bodily desires without giving it a thought.

Live sweet and enjoy life

Your thoughts and contributions are welcomed.