#PhillyPoliceScanner: Total Bedlam + A Missing Riot Horse

You never know how a city is going to handle a Super Bowl win until the light posts come down and the riot horse goes missing.

Forget commercials. The post-game #PhillyPoliceScanner was the highlight of the Super Bowl celebration.

If you missed the game like I did, you should know that the Philadelphia Eagles won.

After the game, Twitter users posted various links to the Philadelphia Police Department’s police scanner on Youtube livestreams. Some hosts were gracious enough to provide a pleasing skin and customized graphics to set their livestream lounges apart. In one livestream, a Black Santa Claus twerked next to two different Periscope feeds of the riot along with the police scanner feed audio. It was luxe. It was an internet party and a fine time was had by all.

It was a priceless play-by-play of the celebrations that erupted when the Eagles took home the W.

I live in Denver and we are guilty of it, too, back in 1998 and 1999. It was amateur hour as Super Bowls go and we learned after later SB wins to not to flip cars, cut down light posts or burn down our city again. We all have our drunken moments and last night, Philadelphia was "that guy" at the party.

You can’t exactly blame Philly for going malatov.

If I have my facts right, this is the FIRST time the eagles have won the championship game. Congratulations to those guys. This is pretty cool since most people didn't want the Patriots to win (again).

I only wanted a recap of the Illuminati half-time show and the outcome of the game so I planned to wake up and get my Super Bowl updates from Twitter today. I wake up early and I would have the scoop right away, over coffee.

I wasn’t disappointed.

I was in my pajamas. Sometimes the best parties happen when you wake up and say “Hey guys, I just woke up. What’s going on?”

“The horse is missing.”

What horse?” I typed.

“The riot horse. His name is Fred. Here is a photo in case you see him.”

I was in Denver in my bed reading this Twitter feed so I probably wasn’t going to be the one to run into Fred.

A short time later, estimates of the number of light poles taken down by revelers ranged from fourteen to fifty to "all of them."

In addition to the missing horse, it was reported that the Liberty Bell and a statue of Rocky Balboa is also missing. This happened around the same time beer kegs were being passed over the gates at City Hall.

Fans of terrible rapper Meek Mill took the opportunity to broadcast their platform. This confused a number of well-dressed men in suits.

The most serious allegations involved lighting Christmas trees on fire. Onlookers were not surprised to find that Philadelphia residents had not yet discarded their Christmas trees.

The MVP of the night was the 911 dispatcher who earned rave reviews for her total lack of emotional response to the bedlam. Fans of the 911 operator applauded her ability to do her job, referring to her as the GOAT dispatcher of all time.

Even Pittsburgh, whose Superbowl ambitions were crushed, wished Philly congratulations on the win.

All in all, it was indeed a hot time in the old town tonite.