Ah ha ha, I love the Yes Men.

"Pope encourages all countries of the world to provide adequate family planning and female health provision, including legalisation of abortion"
The Pontiff tells speechless reporters that whilst he does not condone abortion, considering it a grave sin, he realises that it is more morally offensive to criminalize and vilify young women who may in turn risk their own well-being in seeking back street procedures, or self-medicate with pills procured via the internet with no medical supervision. "It's a bit like the criminalization of drug-use you see", he explained, "criminalizing plain ordinary people just hurts society, hurts tender little souls and exacerbates pain and addiction". He explained that he realised that it was really quite unreasonable to dictate what they could or could not do with their bodies, just because of his own moral prognosis. "Yes I am the voice of God on earth" he said, "but we are all God". He reflected that perhaps the centuries of patriarchy and repression of women and their rights throughout the centuries by the Catholic church could in some ways start to be compensated for by conciliatory gestures from here on. "It is the Age of Aquarius after all", explained the Pontiff, "and surely empowering our sisters is one of the surest ways to address some of the more serious issues we are facing in today's age of ecological crisis and inequality. We are together".

(for sure this is a controversial contribution but I'd find it good news!)