That is a wonderful and well told life-story @mountainjewel. I see no difference in your experiences than with your healer than a christian feeling rebirth or a Buddhist undergoing an awakening to the present moment.
I have and still suffer a chronic illness but have recently discovered a level of peace through acceptance. This is a kind of re-discovering of Buddhist concepts which I drank in when I was young but was somewhat scared psychologically, I didn't have the space to take them on properly then. Your quote from Rumi
The Wound is the place where the light enters you
Rumi
resonated with me strongly. I have been listening to Eckhart Tolle recently which has been the catalyst for finding a deep meditative practice, seemingly out of nowhere. It could probably have been one of many teachers at this time which could have caused this catalyst but I do think Tolle explains well to the western mindset. One thing that is sticking in my mind as I type this and eludes to the quote and words in your story is that he said with acceptance comes freedom from the suffering you make of the illness in your mind. This is maybe 90% true to my cynics mind but I'll take 90% less suffering any day of the week. The truth is that simply stopping the constant angry, bemoaning, frustrated ego-ic dialogue I was having with the world and saying 'oh well, I can't change it' has removed a huge part of what was making me miserable. Sure, I am still sick (it is a long winded dietary GI issue which I have tried endless exclusion diets and medications to try and fix) but without the constant mind chatter about how I'm going to solve it, how will I make all my future plans work..... etc. I've found peace, for the first time in a long time. I'm hoping this will help in the ongoing journey to find the balance that will let me heal as I'm sure it has been accentuated by the worry and rumination. To come full circle back to Rumi's quote, it is at these times of illness or deep wounds that the mind can switch to an open modality and find spontaneous healing and freedom from the constraints of an imagined future that needs to be constantly planned for, but which in fact never comes.
Anyway, the honesty of your story inspired similar from me and I have just realized that this comment is turning into a post of it's own 😉
thanks for sharing your story
We'd love to read your post. What a beautiful comment.
this!!
So glad you've found peace, of sorts. May you find healing on your journey, and then some. xx
definitely Raj! i can really see where you're coming from in your comment. You're right on point here.
This openness is the beginning of the healing. There are so many people that I know for whom there are no apparent reasons for their malady... in these cases, as you've done, finding that psychological peace is a fantastic first step. as @naturalmedicine said, if you feel drawn to make a post, I'd love to read it :) All of our alternative medicine journeys have merit and shed light for others.
furthermore, your situation brings up something else for me. since i was a young girl i've had a reproductive issue for which there is no solution! it's made me feel similarly to how you describe yourself in your comment. there are so many people who the medical system literally cannot touch. in some ways, i've felt like i was on my own trying to figure out my healing (Because i wasn't willing to take a pill for the rest of my life.) It's beneficial that in so many ways, I am not alone in this, but there are many people who also experience issues that doctors don't know the answers to. Some humility in our medical systems is needed, I think, and also honoring of alternative modalities for the strengths that they bring!