My Niche- My Regrets Over Losing True Love

This is my entry for the My Niche contest found here

Source

My story goes this way.

I met Femi when I was just 20 during NYSC. I was posted to Kogi state to serve my fatherland and so boarded Cross Country Transport at the park

Unknown to me, I boarded the wrong bus and was taken to Abuja instead of Kogi. I explained my plight to the driver and he was sympathetic.

However, the only help he could render was that he would drop the Abuja passengers first before taking me to Kogi. That would mean spending two days on the road and leaving me with just a day for camp registration. It was risky, but short of going to another transport company and paying another fair, there was nothing I could do. So, I agreed.

I got to camp very early the next morning and was already tired. I just dragged my huge box to a corner and sat down, bemoaning my fate, when a shadow crossed my path.

I came back from my thoughts to see a guy squatting before me. He had a smile on his face but I was in no mood for that.

In my mind I was like:

"This one thinks he has caught NYSC fish abi. I will show him."

I wanted to tell him off in no small way when he said:

"You look so tired. Is there something I can do to relieve your stress?"

He sounded sincere, and I found myself having a change of heart. I also found myself pouring out all I'd just been through the past few days, something I rarely do with strangers.

He chuckled and offered to buy me breakfast, then said:

" Grab this opportunity o, cos I don't buy food for girls often and this is the only time I'll be buying for you"

It was my time to laugh and this was the start of a friendship.

We became inseparable and soon progressed into a relationship. He was everything I wished for in a man and he loved me so completely. He pampered me silly and taught me so many things I didn't know.

On my part?

While I loved him too, I took him for granted. That was my first real relationship and I didn't appreciate the good thing I had.

I was sturbbon, would talk to him anyhow, and didn't show him love. I felt if he knew how much I loved him he would take me for granted.

I told him I wanted a sex-free relationship and he respected that. Not once did he pester me for sex.

In the end, he grew tired of my attitude and left and this was when it dawned on me I was losing him. I tried all I could to make him stay but his mind was made up.

I became broken. I was devastated by his leaving. My life became a void and it took me the best part of three years to get over him.

Sometimes my mind flashes back to that time and I still feel a dull throb.

I wish I could go back and do things differently. I wish I had one more chancr to show him things could be different.

If I had that, I would throw away those norms we women are made to believe

• Don't show a man you love him or he will take you for granted.

• If you like him pretend, let him be the first to make a move.

• Never say sorry to a man or you lose your respect before him.

I have since dropped these beliefs and my life has been so much better for it. But sometimes I wonder, if I didn't drop them a few years too late.