Source.

We all know home life can be hectic.

Mom, dad, and kids all have their separate agendas and goals. Things they want to be doing and to get done. Time is at a premium. On top of that, you've got the dishes to be done, clothes to be washed, and vacuuming to do. This type of situation tends to lend itself to squabbles, which, when they occur day after day, can be a real energy drain for the fam. You know you all love each other, but damn, if it doesn't just seem like everything is out of wack, sometimes. And by "sometimes," I mean almost every damn day! ;)

My approach tonight.

I mentioned in my previous Unschooling Blog post that I have been affording my 4-year-old son more and more personal freedoms, as I feel I should, and I have been blown away by the results. When he feels that I am actually treating him as an equal, and not a little "half human" that should simply follow my commands, he seems to fill with pride, become empowered, and make pretty damn good choices.

Tonight, after his mother had left for band practice--and we had all had somewhat of a hectic day--I put on some music for atmosphere and told him I was going to clean a bit. He really was getting into the music (the "My Neighbor Totoro," Tonari No Totoro, soundtrack). He was dancing all around in the kitchen and doing flying leaps into the futon, etc. We eventually began dancing together and laughing. It was fun.

Later, we put on an Apple Music Playlist, which is a compilation of Studio Ghibli songs interpreted by the Kazumi Tateishi Trio. It's called "Ghibli Meets Jazz," and it's just great for creating a calm, happy evening atmosphere in the house. I even noticed that my son seemed to be playing in a remarkably relaxed way by himself, while the music was playing. He didn't really notice the music, maybe, but when it stopped, so did his play, and he asked me to put on another song. I thought this was interesting. The relaxed jazz also created a nice atmosphere for when my wife got home. I recommend!

Doing the dishes.

I fucking hate doing dishes. I don't know why, but it is just one of those chores that seems to drive me nuts. Isaiah, my son, was already helping with the vacuum cleaner tonight, so I thought I might make doing the dishes more fun by getting him involved as well. I asked him whether he wanted to rinse or dry. He chose to dry. I had him set up on a bench right behind me in the kitchen. I would rinse a dish, pass it to him, and then he would dry it and choose a good spot for it in the cabinet below. I started to give the dishes "personalities," and making them laugh when he dried them, and making them beg him to stop as if they were very ticklish. He loved this, and we got all the dishes done together. I think he felt proud and mature to be part of the important "adult" process of cleaning the house.

So, I guess the moral of this story is, if you can make it a game...DO IT!!!!! And be sure to have good music on while the game is in gear!

I put this part of the post here at the end (although it is the first part of the title), because in many ways I believe the music really shaped and directed our night tonight, and thank God for that! I'm not sure that without the "existence sauce" the music provides for smoothing things out in the house, we would have ever played the "dish game" at all. So, in short...here's to music, jokes, and games!

That's it for today. Unschool on!

~KafkA

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Graham Smith is a Voluntaryist activist, creator, and peaceful parent residing in Niigata City, Japan. Graham runs the "Voluntary Japan" online initiative with a presence here on Steem, as well as Facebook and Twitter. (Hit me up so I can stop talking about myself in the third person!)