Do not pay to see this "movie".

I just wanted to make sure that would show up in the preview to help you avoid wasting your money on this.

Do you see where it says "television series"? They should have stuck to that idea.

Just because I am strongly advising everyone to avoid paying to see Inhumans, it does not mean I completely hated it. In fact, I will most likely watch the television show... but that is just it. This is a television show.

When I heard that ABC/Disney would be premiering a new superhero show via a limited engagement in movie theaters, I was intrigued. I assumed it would be one of those one night only engagements many theaters exhibit on Tuesday nights. When I was looking for the specific Tuesday night, I noticed it was playing all week... in IMAX!

Wow! A televison series debuting in IMAX theaters. That is unique. I figured if the studio went to this trouble to actually try something novel, I should at least give it a shot.

Thanks to my son, our whole family (consisting of my wife, our 12 year old son, our 10 year old daughter and me) are huge Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. fans. When the show first premiered, my wife and I watched a couple of episodes. Because I thought it looked kind of "cheesy" and I hated two of the main actors (Chloe Bennet and Brett Dalton), we gave up on it after a few episodes. We never thought about it again. Then last summer, my son (who is quickly becoming a marvel completest) discovered it on Netflix and started to watch. My wife and I joined him. We loved it! It had gotten so much better. Eventually my daughter joined in the fun as well.

Because Inhumans is a loose spinoff of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. my son and I decided to fork over the $20 to see it on the big screen.

After reading some bad reviews, I decided it would not be worth the added drive time to see it in true IMAX... so in the name of convenience, we watched it in LieMAX. For once, I'm happy I did.

It was bad that this "movie" was not worth the money. It would have been worse if it cost me an extra hour on the road.

The idea of releasing a television show on IMAX sounded like a great idea. Unfortunately, the execution was horrendous. People pay extra at an IMAX theater for the sights and sounds. We want to see and hear breathtaking action. I assumed that ABC would realize this and make sure this hype generating project would be filled with more action and special effects than a typical television show. I figured it would be special.

I was incredibly wrong.

This was two low budget 42-minute long television shows shot with a special camera and spliced together to make one "movie". There was nothing special about it at all. In fact, if I were watching in my living room, I would have been disappointed with the lack of action. Perhaps they were worried that the special effects would not look good on the huge screen. Well they sure took care of that by making sure there were almost no special effects at all.

They knew people would be paying $10-$15 per ticket for this. They were attracting the most zealous fans. It was incredibly foolish to make the most excited would-be viewers feel cheated and angry.

Luckily, I am not in that category. Thanks to my son, I am annoyed but not angry. He enjoyed it quite a bit... because he is twelve...and it wasn't his money. So I got something for my money. I was able to hang out with my son and enjoy a very unique (if poorly executed) movie experience.

However, I think I would have enjoyed it nearly as much by sitting next to him on our couch and watching it on the small screen.

But what about the "movie"?

This is tough. I want to go on a rant but that would involve way too many spoilers. I don' think people should avoid the show... but no one should pay for this when they can see it for free in three weeks (these 2 episodes will air on ABC on Friday, September 29th).

So without spoiling it too much, here is the good, the bad, and the ugly of Marvel's Inhumans.

The Good

Although... how big do you think the pooper-scooper needs to be?

• It takes place in the Marvel universe so it is connected to the other shows and movies.
• It is a loose spinoff of a show my family really enjoys.
• The Royal family of the Inhumans includes some really fun and cool characters.
• The king of the Inhumans is super tough and has to communicate via sign language (I think it is important to show this type of diversity).
• There was a small amount of humor mixed in.
• My twelve year old son likes it.
• Lockjaw! (He is a giant teleporting Bulldog... and he is awesome! My son loved him).

The Bad

You think he's about to do something cool right? Nope.

• Very little action.
• If you haven't seen Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. you may be confused.
• Some of the acting is horrendous.
• Some huge plot holes (one involving surfers.. yes surfers.)
• It does not work as an 84-minute long movie. I would have been much happier watching this as two 42 minute episodes. There is no way I would "binge watch" this.
• It is an origin story. Origin stories are always a little too slow for me.
• There are several scenes that I don't want my ten year old to see (Including a useless sex scene and a case of pretty severe police brutality).
• The bad guy is actually kind of right (more on this below if you don't mind a spoiler).

The Ugly

Oh no. It's not the actress that belongs in this category. It is that cheap thing on her head. And this is on a small screen. Imagine it in IMAX... on second thought, don't.

• Medusa's hair. It looks so fake that it is distracting.

Warning Spoiler Below!

The movie centers around a coup lead by, Maximus, the brother of the King of the Inhuman Capital City of Attilan. Maximus is "only human" (he has no powers) and is not treated with the same respect as those who have powers. In fact, all of the Inhumans without superpowers are mistreated. They are forced to live in the bottom dwellings of the palace city and to work in the mines while the Inhumans with powers live in luxury.

So yeah... Maximus is right. He should fight to gain equal treatment for all of the Inhumans. I can already tell this is going to be the biggest problem for me moving forward. It's a superhero story. Keep it simple. The bad guys should be really bad an the good guys should be really good. Do I really want the King to get his power back so he can force the "only humans" to work in mines?

I think the writers made a HUGE mistake here. If they were wise, they would have made Maximus the one responsible for "enslaving" the humans of Attilan.

Ok you can come back now.

Even though the theatrical experience was underwhelming and there are some flaws with the story and acting, I am going to give the television show a chance. Ultimately, for me, this is about sharing something with my son. He can't wait for the show to start. I can't wait to sit next to him and watch it. He's twelve. One day very soon he may not think it is "cool" to watch a show with his dad. So if there is any hope that I will be entertained at all, I am am going to cherish these opportunities.

Hopefully there will be more good than bad and ugly.

Geeky Dad's Movie Guide

Number of times I fell asleep: 0
Number of eye rolls: 5
Number of face palms: 3
Number of times my kid asked to go to the bathroom or get food out of sheer boredom: 0
Number of times I checked steemit: 0
Number of times I said "That's ridiculous": 2
Did my kid like it: I only brought my 12 year old son. My 10 year old daughter is too young. He enjoyed it quite a bit.
Would I see it without my kids: No. I am only going to watch this show if my son wants to.
Full price/Matinee/Rental/Free/Not worth the time: Do not pay money to see this! I will give the show a chance though.

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