Daily Jokes from SydesJokes for 30 Dec 2017

in #motivation3 years ago

Joke 1

Stephen Colbert on Climate Change

SydesJokes Daily Digest

Original post: http://bit.ly/2BYlPHV


Joke 2

Error: keyboard locked - try anything you can think of.


Joke 3

A guy walked into the doctor's office for an appointment. "Would you like to tell me your problem?" the pretty receptionist asked. "I'll need the information for the doctor."

"It's rather embarrassing," the guy stammered. "You see, I have a very large and almost constant erection."

"Well, the doctor is very busy today," the receptionist cooed, "but maybe I can squeeze you in."


Joke 4

Q: Why did the dinosaur walk across the road?
A: Because chickens were not invented yet.


Joke 5

"I want to be a tightrope walker. What equipment do I need?" asked a prospective circus employee.

"Very flexible shoes, two towers, a wire, a pole and a bank book." responded the ringmaster.

"I understand the shoes, towers, wire and pole, but what's the bank book for?" inquired the man.

"To check your balance, of course."


Joke 6

A nurse was taking care of a soldier in the Army Hospital.

"How I wish I could kiss the American flag before I die," the soldier said.

The nurse was extremely touched by the soldier's patriotism and said, "I have a tattoo of the American flag on my bottom. You may kiss it if you don't mind."

"Of course I wouldn't mind. Thank you for fulfilling my last wish." the soldier said.

The nurse took off her panties and the dying soldier kissed the flag.

"Thank you, nurse." he said "Now would you be so kind as to turn around so that I could kiss Bush too?"


Joke 7

Once upon a time, there were 3 little pigs. The straw pig, the stick pig, and the brick pig. One day this nasty old wolf came up to the straw pig's house and said, "I'm gonna huff and puff, and blow your house down." So he did!

The straw pig went running over to the stick pig's house and said, "Let me in, please, the wolf just blew down my house!"

The stick pig let the straw pig in. Then the wolf showed up and said, "I'm gonna huff and puff, and blow your house down!" And he did!

So, the straw pig and the stick pig went running over to the brick pig's house and said, "Let us in! The wolf just blew down our houses and we're scared!"

So the brick pig let them in. The wolf caught up with them and said, "I'm gonna huff and puff, and blow your house down."

While he was huffing and puffing, the straw pig and the stick pig were so scared. But the brick pig picked up the phone and called a friend. A few minutes passed and all of a sudden this big, black stretch limousine drove up. Out came two massive pigs in pinstriped suits and fedoras. These huge pigs came over to the wolf and grabbed him by the neck and proceeded to beat the crap out of him. Then they got back into their limo and drove off.

The straw pig and the stick pig were amazed. They asked the brick pig, "Who the heck were those guys?"

And the brick pig said, "Oh, those are my cousins, the Guinea Pigs."


Joke 8

Q: What has four wheels and flies?
A: A rubbish truck.


Cryptocoinopoly

SydesJokes Daily Digest

Original post: http://bit.ly/2BVKMUp


Originally post at: https://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2017/12/daily-jokes-from-sydesjokes-for-30-dec.html


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Joke 4: Even road was not invented that time.

Good Joker #1. I Share it to frends.

HAPPY NEW YEAR
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SAMER
RED-ROSE

@red-rose thanks @sydesjokes has good contents.

Whenever it is cold there is another area on the planet that is the opposite. The air circulation of the planet involves four quadrants per hemisphere that are constantly exchanging wind and temperature through interaction. The temperature hemispheres of the planet that you know as summer and winter rely upon the movement of the extreme temperature areas around the poles and their corresponding sub quadrants (2 relatively hot and 2 relatively cold per hemisphere) for the inevitable exchange of convection currents that combine to transfer the heat from each hemisphere during spring and fall and on a smaller scale create similar weather patterns with each other. If you study these patterns you may be able to predict the weather and location of storms several weeks in advance.

Nice show hahaha that's classic
Follow and upvote me plz thanks

hee hee-- I like #4. Have a great day! Thank you!

Really funny jokes lol, weldone

Hell of a flying truck!haha

hahaha, too funny. Keep them coming

Really he should be not given food or be at the situation with people who crave for food once in a while.

haha :) good job!

@sydesjokes this is hilarious!!!!!

joke no. 2 is great and keep it up...

Joke 6 was good ;-)

I like the #4....Chickens hehe

ya for sure global warming is a joke haha. nobody can deny it.

Joke 2: Error 404, Joke not found.

good job man. thanks for sharing

Hahah nice jokes i liked #3 👍

Yes, cryptomania started...

Stephen Colbert isn't serious, he should come to Africa then he would know the difference.

This was against Trump over his comment that because is was cold they needed some Global Warning.

#2. i just did and it still didn't work.

I really want that Cryptopoly :P It looks amazing :) Thanks for sharing. Had a good laugh at it :) . Happy Holidays.

You just made my day today; happy holidays and the best of next year.

Joke #2 is no joke when it happens to you. I had an iphone that malfunctioned and wouldn't let me slide the button to turn it off. I had to wait for the battery to run out before I could reboot it.

Oh man I just loved Stephen Colbert!

For #1 joke...Stephen must be a full time clown . Lolz!

Really like the "Cryptocoinopoly". Hahaha

awsome photos!!

hahahah......well said for tight rope walker you need a bank account balance:)

That monopoly board with cryptocoins is definitely a hit :D

"Can I kiss bush too?" Wth did I just read? It's still hilarious though. 😀😁😂

Amazing jokes again.

hi hi geat jokes.

keep voting

Lol the first one is hilarious 😂

nice joke @sydesjokes, keep it up

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