RE: There is neither need nor necessity to wallow in the trough of mediocrity!
I really don't have any favorite quotes, perse. But there's a couple I've collected in the last several months that I'll throw in for consideration. The first apparently was a tweet originally (I found it quoted somewhere else):
I liked it because of a couple of things.
In some cases, complaining informs someone of an injustice or something that needs to be rectified, but too often it solves nothing.
Instead of fighting the system, make it moot, or obsolete, by creating something where the status quo and the current rules don't apply.
I like it even more because of STEEM.
The second quote I have is from a fictional superhero, Captain America, but someone had to write it, or adapt it from another source. In other words, an actual human wrote this:
I especially like the last part. If the whole world tells you to move because you're not going along with them, but you feel in your heart that you are doing the right thing then:
Your job is to plant yourself like a tree beside the river of truth, and tell the whole world, "No. You Move."
The top quote is awesome; and you're right! I always said to my kids, quit bitchin' about it and do something to change it. Once again, you're a bit more eloquent than me :)
My youngest, one time in elementary school (grade 4), was complaining that our school didn't have a tether ball game on the playground. I gave him my "quit bitchin" about it quote and he stomped off to his room, but came down a hour later to show me a power point presentation he'd prepared. I signed him up for the PAC (parent advisory committee) meeting and he presented it. They were so impressed, a tether ball pole was installed one week later!! Chip of the ol' block, that one haha
I especially like the exact same piece you chose out of Captain America's speech too. It's such a difficult thing to do...stand up for what is right, against a group no less, but we must follow our hearts regardless.
Thanks Glen :)
It's pretty interesting to me how we often react to those who complain. There may be times where we sympathize, particularly at the beginning, but after a while, even though the nature of the original injustice or reason for the complaint hasn't changed, we basically tell people to just deal with it. As in the nature of things aren't going to change just by complaining.
What needs to follow, and I'm fairly guilty of this still, is to include some instruction, such as, "What are you going to do about it?" and then help to brainstorm possible avenues and solutions to pursue. In your case, your son was motivated enough to come up with something on his own, which is actually the best thing, but in other cases, there might be a need for a nudge. :)
We certainly don't want injustices, and we certainly don't want our children thinking that it's never okay to complain—because that can equate to reporting a wrong that no one else knows about, but we also don't want them growing up thinking that just complaining is going to resolve every issue.
re: river of truth
This for me is the hardest. We're not only talking what we believe to be right, but the actual truth. That can be hard to know, especially when the entire world is going the other way. In my case, I need to rely on a higher power than I'm capable of, but regardless of the source, or how we arrive, it's a key element. If we're wrong in our stance, sure we stood up for what is right, but then we will regret it if it turns out to be wrong. So, a tricky deal, which makes me admire the Captain Americas of the world even more. :)
After my grandfather died, I remember my grandmother saying that she never complained about being alone because all of the people who visited her would simply stop coming, because "who wants to listen to that all day". She understood what you are saying; people have sympathy for a while and then, it's "shape up or ship out" kind of thing. I should add that they were married for 65 years; she was an amazing woman.
I think you hit the nail on the head though, especially with children; we need to brainstorm together and/or offer alternatives, because yes, they will complain, but kids are so self-centered that they can't help but focus solely on the pain and trauma being done to them:) It's our job to change that focus. I guess it's the same for some adults as well...unfortunately.
re: the river of truth
From what little I know about you Glen, I think you would be a "Captain America" if you felt strongly enough about something.
You just made me remember something from when I was in grade 2 or 3, if you can believe it! I remember a girl named Liza, and for whatever reason, she was the one that a lot of kids picked on. One day I saw it happening; everyone was playing a game and she was being excluded. I didn't understand all of it at that age, but I can still remember how sorry I felt for her, standing there, alone. I remember my sweaty palms still...convincing myself to go stand beside her too. I mustered up the courage and did just that, and I can still see her buck-toothed smile as I type this. Funny enough, I don't remember anything that happened after it. I guess that wasn't the important part.
Perhaps it's empathy we also need to be teaching children.
That's a great story. It really shouldn't be that hard to stand up for others, but it can be. Personally, I think that speaks volumes about you, and the person you've grown to be.
I don't think I really fit in with any groups myself, but I shuttled back and forth between a few. I wasn't super smart, but I was smart enough to hang out with the really smart kids. I wasn't much of an athlete, but I was good enough and enjoyed it enough to hang out with them. I joined the Drama club, which is a whole different set of kids, a lot of them who didn't fit in anywhere else, so they formed their own cliche.
So, within those groups you had the popular and not, the well off and not, and the go getters, the coaters, and the perpetually picked on. I think I managed to float among most if not all of them. Too bad I was mostly an introvert to boot, or I might have enjoyed it all. :)
I remember eating sack lunch with four or five other kids who were like me, not really attached to any specific group, but moving between them because of our scholastic, athletic or expressive capabilities.
Kind of weird to look back on it. Glad I don't need to go through that ever again. :)
I don't know about being Captain America, but I do find myself increasingly on the opposite end of decisions and arguments that the majority seem to be making. I can be contrarian, though, so I don't know if that's just me taking the opposite side just to do it, or if it's because it's the right thing. It's hard to know sometimes.
I'm glad you enjoyed the story. I mused on it for some time after I wrote that wondering if Liza remembers it also. My parents were big on empathy, so it certainly shaped who I am today. When I was younger, my empathy was easy pickins' for those looking to take advantage, and it happened a couple times, but thankfully I'm also smart and figured out how to be both:)
You could not pay me to go back to my high school years either. I think it's a pretty tough time for the majority of people, except those who peak in high school, and are forever looking longingly back on the good ol' days :)
Now listen! Don't be that guy who holds the opposite opinion just because it's the opposite opinion! I think you are way smarter than that ;)
Intelligence, in my case, doesn't seem to matter, or else I'm not that smart. It just happens. It's like I should have become a professional at debating or something. if I know the sides, I don't have to agree with them to adequately debate them. Someone says something and a counter argument just materializes. It can actually be quite annoying sometimes because I just want to agree and let it go. :)
Aside for the first three and a half years of elementary school (things changed in fourth grade when we moved over Christmas break), high school is the next best time for me. Which should tell you how my middle school years went. :)
I think I started coming out of my shell a little more in high school after pretty much being pounded into it during middle school, so that's something. As I said, though, being humbled to some degree was good for me. The road I was on, even if I was young, was not a good one and I needed to be taken off of it, since I wasn't likely to do it myself.
You've got some good and not-so-good stories I'm hearing then!
Ugh! Middle school is the worst! I despise the entire concept actually.
Yeah, I do, though I think I've managed to some degree to forget my middle school years. Lot more failures than successes.
We ended up pulling our oldest out of seventh and eighth grade to home school him because during his sixth grade year, he would end up in tears because of the homework the teacher sent home. He just couldn't keep up with it to his own satisfaction—very conscientious about his grades at that point (still is, but he doesn't cry now, as far as I know anyway).
Best two years of his scholastic life up until that time took place during that time. I homeschooled both of them, and learned a lot in the process. When he went back to public school as a freshman in high school, he was feeling better about his abilities and his knowledge.
The younger one would have been fine either way. Didn't start caring about school or his grades until he got into college. :) I think it was partly because he was trying to impress his future wife, who is a lot more demanding of herself scholastically. It was good for him.