My financial life

I like to be open.
I like to be honest.
And this counts for my financial life aswell.
So here we go.
For the first time ever, I am going to be mega honest about my financial shiz.

I have been one lucky lady in life.

I have never really had to worry about money.
Somehow I always knew it was going to be okay.
I grew up quite well off due to my father being an kickass entrepreneur in the music industry.
Instead of spending money on expensive stupid shit, we went travelling!
I've seen way more countries before I was six, then I have after that!

But then, my parents broke up.
And my mum and I moved to Spain. ( This journey in itself is pretty damn amazing and I'll write it about it soon!)
In Spain, even though we were supported by my father financially, it wasn't enough to cover the basics costs.
So my mum worked as a nurse/cleaner/second hand shop attendant.
I had a 'job' too.
Every Sunday we stood on a flea market and I sold all our old shit.
And damn, I was so good at it.
Imagine this.
A little girl of 7 years old, always wearing a French baret hat, being one of the toughest negotiators on the whole market.
It was wonderful.

Even though technically we weren't poor, it felt as poor because I was surrounded by all these rich kids living in a mansions, their parents driving the latest cars and getting spending money which just seemed utterly outrageous to give to such children.
These were the kids that flew with their parents to New York to do Christmas shopping. It was insane.

When I was 16, I moved back to Holland to go live with my father.
And once again, money was never an issue.
I got an allowance from my father, worked in his cd/lp shop, had others jobs plus I got benefits from the government for being a young person and later on being a student.
I always said that I was a rich student because I really did feel that way!

It was in that time, that an emotionally abusive boyfriend of mine, convinced me to take out a loan so he could pay his loans off.
SUCH. A. TERRIBLE. IDEA.
But hey, I was in love, really young and really really really dumb.
I took out a loan of €5000 which I used probably €1000 for myself, and the rest was for him.
Oh fuck, even just writing those words make me cringe with utter discomfort.
How could I have been so massively stupid??
I like to think I am sort of intelligent human being ( mostly ).
Anyway, after we broke up, he ofcourse didn't want to pay me back which resulted in me getting into quite a lot of problems with the bank and the authorities.
I look back at this experience with gratefulness because you know what? The amount could have been A LOT higher and then I would really have been in shit, instead of a really good slap on the knuckles.

This made me want to look after my money a lot better. And really, I did get a lot better.
But I didn't really pay attention to my money.
I just always had this vague idea of how much money was coming and how much money was going out.
Never really precise.

Plus I never had any understanding of taxes.
Boy do we have a shitload of taxes in Holland.
And I just do not understand how even though I am earning very little money, they still manage to take a massive chunk out of it.
It just feels like robbery to me.

And this is where I constantly go wrong.

I always get a little shock when I get my tax bill in.
And then I got an accountant to help me out, and he charged me way more than expected so now I am running out of money. ONCE AGAIN.

And you know, I have ALWAYS known that there are other ways to make money.
But somehow they never felt intuitive enough or as if I had to offer up a part of my soul to get the cash.
And I know that this is a first world problem but really, working in an office for five days a week, eight hours a day just makes my heart bleed and my soul die slowly.
It just kills me.

So here I am, on Steemit.
Knowing that here I can be myself and know that in time I can get cash coming in.
This isn't the reason why I am on here.
I am on here because I love the core of this whole thing.
The community.
The giving.
The sharing.
The positivity.

It inspires me to be here, to share and to be part of this wonderful group of people.

So this is my financial state of being right now.

I am earning €1000 a month.
By having a part-time job and working as a freelance barista a few days a month.

I earn enough to support myself.
Sometimes I have no money left whatsoever.
Sometimes there is way over €1000 in there.

But I know that it can be WAY more than that.
I know that I can sustain myself and have a wonderful lifestyle, by being myself.

By writing, vlogging and starting a webshop business.
Will tell you more about that when I have got it up and running!

So here I am.
In my €1000 a month glory.
Hi, it's nice to meet you!
It'd be lovely to make way more than that.
If you've got any tips, I'd love to hear them!

BIG love,

Ashley