Duuuuude! Super needed to see this right now. I just got done with a difficult consulting meeting in which I was sure going into it there was a 50/50 chance the client was going to terminate my contract (apparently I was a little TOO blunt on the phone with my feedback last week.)

Ultimately, I decided to go in and try to be positive and prepared to accept all outcomes as the outcome that was needed at this time in my life. I ultimately understood this to be an opportunity for growth, and ultimately it was in my best interests to stay with these folks (I work in recreational cannabis and it's hard to find decent folks to work with out here.)

I took some lumps. Had to swallow some pride. Bite my tongue.

A lot.

I am pretty sure my fingers will be sore tomorrow from the hand-wringing I was doing under the table.

In essence, I faked it. Totally faked I was kewl with things, but understood that in this moment me smiling and their unwillingness to cop to any crummy behavior was not "selling out" but rather me making sure I wasn't going to let my mouth or pride get in the way of what is, in the end, an amazing opportunity.

I left the meeting having to work no hours on site and a guaranteed salary that can meet 90% of my monthly income needs.

WTF?!

And within minutes of leaving the meeting the CEO was calling me again with more stuff to do.

I spent a decade advising folks in recovery to follow the advice: "fake it till you make it."

I was upset in this meeting today. I put on the happy face.

It wasn't easy, but I do feel it helped keep my emotions in check (and that is important because emotions get us into these situations to begin with a lot haha).

And in the end the restraint on my part served, at the very least, as a chance for the boss to give me a chance to move forward.

I wasn't totally satisfied with the outcome (I wanted to see the manager admit he was being a dick on the phone to me at the time as well) but that is OK. You win some, you lose some.

I would have to credit the appearance of optimism during the meeting to have really helped. Fake it till you make it isn't just an exercise in appeasing others. To me, it is also an exercise in self- restraint.

Mastery of self.

And THAT is why this post resonated for me Holly. Thanks a bunch for sharing your thoughts. Blessings.