I hear ya, @volanarchist. There are some styles that teach only personal development and some that teach only bare-bones fundamentals of self defense. Everything in between is a sport. Sports have rules. Self defense has no rules.
Quote from my sensei:
"You know what is the biggest ripoff? Cocaine! You are only high for like 15 minutes" -from my first day of studying at the school.
Another quote:
Sensei: "Dave, what would you do if some bad guy came through the door and said he would kill us all?"
Student: "I'd hit him with that water bottle. Then, I'd hit him with that chair until he stopped being an asshole."
Sensei: Without pause. "If he didnt stop being an asshole?"
Student: "I'd push that fridge over and drop it on him so he could get up."
Sensei: "And what will you tell the cops?"
Student: "I'd say he fell. And then the fridge fell on top of him. It was a horrible accident, officer.
Sensei: "Yep. Go with that."