The Top 9 Best Marriage Advice: The Secret to a Happy Marriage
Using this professional advice could lead to a happy ever after.
Weddings are a lot of fun, but being married isn't always a piece of cake, despite all the dancing and laughter. There's actually a lot of work that goes into living "happily ever after," so whether you've been married for years or just got hitched, we asked the experts what couples can do to have a happy marriage. (Sometimes it's more like the frosting chunk that went up your nose during the smash—good intentions, but wrong outcome.) For a stronger, better, and yes, more happy relationship, heed their wise advice.
To start, even happy couples have disagreements.
No marriage experiences constant happiness. There are ups and downs in relationships, according to psychotherapist Erica MacGregor. But she adds that when couples do argue, happy marriages listen to each other's viewpoints, spot when the conversation is losing steam, and fix the problem. The fact that you and your spouse occasionally argue or are going through a difficult time does not necessarily indicate that you are in an unhappy marriage, according to family and couples therapist Dr. Juliana Morris, who claims that some of the happiest couples she has worked with "have weathered hard times." It's likely a sign that you're normal.
Maximize each other's advantages.
It's not always simple to look past tiny irritations, and there may even be occasions when you resent your partner. But to have a good marriage, you must be able to set reasonable expectations and accept your partner's abilities and flaws. If you are better with numbers, you should also learn to control your anger when your partner balances the checkbook. Make it your responsibility to set the budget instead. If cooking is their specialty, they can handle dinner preparation instead. According to her, "using our strengths consistently is linked to increased wellbeing, and when we support our partner in using their talents, we enjoy greater relational happiness."
Don't look to your partner to make you perfect.
Reminder: Jerry Maguire is a fictional character from a movie. It was beautiful when he said, "You complete me, but that's not how it works in the real world." According to Pawelski, relying on your spouse to satisfy you might result in an overly reliant relationship where neither of you is developing personally. She argues that in a successful relationship, partners should "complement," not "complete," one another. So make sure you develop your interests and desires—take a class you're interested in, and make plans with friends—instead of waiting on your spouse to fill in the emptiness. "We should be secure, mature, and entire in ourselves while being open to the other person."
but continue to work together. Together, enjoy yourself. To keep a good marriage, it's essential to not completely rely on your spouse, but it's also critical to share mutual experiences. Adding new hobbies and interests to your relationship can make it stronger.
Couples develop together when they pursue a special interest or acquire a new ability, like taking tennis lessons or culinary classes. Contented couples share a positive outlook on life with one another. These experiences strengthen their relationship, whether it is through a shared love of travel, a strong desire to start a family, or a commitment to a cause.
Decide to be drawn to your spouse.
Whether you find your partner attractive is up to you. You guessed it—yes. Throughout your marriage, you have the choice to decide if you find your partner attractive. Focus on the qualities that most appeal to you, such as your spouse's amazing legs or the way they raise your children (it need not be physical). The good news is that you can be attracted to someone even if they aren't a cover model. According to Chute, "Physical attraction is significantly deeper than aesthetics." Happy marriages are based on a sense of connection.
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Join in the laughter.
Since life is difficult, it's helpful to be able to find humor even when things are at their worst. People who advise couples to find comedy in both good and terrible situations say that when a couple is funny, it usually signifies they have perspective. She claims that happy married couples seem more at ease with one another. Whether it's through small inside jokes, an unexpectedly amusing text, or even just watching your favorite comedy together, she says, sharing laughter with your partner may strengthen your relationship.
Be considerate of one another.
In order to maintain a good marriage, avoid criticizing your spouse's character while you're upset. If you are critical and judgmental, it usually results in defensiveness and resentment. For instance, she advises against saying, "You're such a slob! See how much nicer it sounds if you say something like, "Because I made supper, I'd really love it if you could do the dishes tonight."
Celebrate the little victories.
The majority of us are aware of how crucial it is to support our partners through difficult times, but, according to her, it's also crucial to celebrate the good times. She claims that although happier events do occur more frequently than unhappy ones, couples frequently pass up these chances to get close. Therefore, the next time your spouse shares something positive—like a compliment from their boss—immediately stop what you're doing and give it your full attention. Help them savor the moment by asking questions and genuinely celebrating the good news. By doing this, you'll express gratitude for the joyful times in your marriage.
Respect each other.
It's easy to take someone for granted when you're around them all the time, so you should openly thank them every day. We all need to feel acknowledged and reinforced for the things we are doing correctly. For instance, if your spouse brings you coffee in the morning, tell them it made your day with a grin. You might also tell them something you enjoy about them. We might become estranged if we don't feel appreciated.
Accept change and prepare for it.
believes that for a marriage to be truly happy, both partners must be open to change and growth. Relationships develop, people grow, and our needs change with time. Therefore, what we need today might not be what we need in the future. It's essential to bend, flex, and pivot alongside one another in a coordinated dance, according to her. Because in a healthy marriage, one partner helps the other develop into their best selves, which calls for both individual and collective maturation. "Until you die, you shall
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