Powerless to Self-Centric

When my alarm went off this morning, I rolled over and went back to sleep. This hasn't happened to me in a few days, but used to be the norm. I have been waking up early to write these blogs because of the benefit I see in my day and life, but until very recently, I couldn't get myself up any earlier than I had to.

Due to this, I woke up this morning feeling 'powerless.' It kind of goes with the theme lately, where I see that if i don't really want to do something, I can't force myself. I see this pattern within myself at work too, it's like, if it isn't absolutely necessary, i don't want to do it just for shits and giggles.

I look back and see that growing up, there have been many aspects of life that I 've seen as things that I just HAD to do, that didn't really matter, that I didn't see the point in but i was forced to do anyways. Like school, social norms and various lessons.
Like waking up early and jumping into a pool of cold water instead of sleeping in and watching cartoons.

I developed this view that life is a series of things I have to do for other people, where I am not the starting point of my actions.

I really need to change this to where I am the starting point to my actions.

My support word for today will be 'self-centric', but I will place my own definition of the term. This is not the same as egoistic or self-centered, where only self is considered. It is living by taking care and doing what is best for self first, so that self can be developed into it's best version and full potential, within a consideration for others, because if you can't 'do you', then you can't really be an example to anyone else.

To day I will live self-centric, wherein I will look at the things I do throughout the day, and make sure it is benefiting and supporting me to learn, expand and grow, and also heal and chill out and just be.