Life-Death-Afterlife or not you need to stop suffering right now.

I am a man who has, to be honest betrayed, all those people who I held most dear in my most absurd sense of judgement. Or at least I love to think of it that way. I am the type of person who puts other people before myself. But today this post is going to be more about you rather than making it a narcissistic article about myself. So, betraying the one's I held dear. You name it be it my lover , be it my best friends, friends more to me than brothers and , parents , God. You name it. Those whom I loved most. Sometimes it feels that is like my soul purpose in life. Wow. What a purpose right? So, what am I going to talk about. Im going to give a message out for all of you who are broken down inside that it really is okay. Even if it hurts it'll turn out for the better cause it always does. What you have to focus on right now is on yourself. Restructuring yourself from the root up keeping away all the stuff in your mind aside or pretending to keep it aside so that it becomes a second nature. I would honestly like to suggest to to enjoy the pain while it lasts although it might seem really bad to be said in that manner and you might think of me as a lame writer or condolence provider. But just try to think about this there are a lot of people in a whole lot worse situation you currently are in. That isn't supposed to make you feel better rather I target this line to reach to you as a wake up call to your objective mind. People make mistakes, people hurt and get hurt . And people move on. It's just a beaytiful part of life. It is when you get caught up in an emotional distress that you quit seeking out to your logical mind for help. Instead of feeling pain and experiencing it as a traumatic experience may be you would find it better to think of the pain as a short lasting thing just as much as you feel your lost love to be. But what I want to say is be in the moment and embrace it even if it hurts and turn it off bu being a new you, focusing on your goals in life. Even if it feels you have nothing to do anymore yet still I offer you my piece of advice that you stop running after everything you want at certain points. Everything is going to be complicated doesn't mean you have to be desperate to fix every broken piece to get them together. Right. You can't have everything you want and you need to learn to live with it. Again It is not necessarily a requirement you keep punishing yourself for you caused suffering to other. If you have the best thing you can do is apologize in the most humble way and often that can be a great way for them to know that you have grown and understand what you did was wrong.I learned this from a show I used to love
i dont know what Im saying anymore.
Don't put others above yourself , learn to be a little bit more selfish. Will do you a lot more good than bad.
Stop filling yourself with long lost guilt from the past. Try to be a better and changed person learning from your mistakes which is the mature thing to do.
Apologize if you feel like it's going to help you overcome your problems and leave you with a saner more peaceful mind.
Try mindfulness to get rid of the thoughts.
Learn something new everyday.
Figure out your goals and what you want to be. Build on that , be a better person.