Dear my ex

I miss you. I hate to admit it, but I really do. I miss our laughs , our inside jokes. I often find myself reminiscing about the memories we made. You left an imprint on my soul. You took a part of me that I am never getting back. I continue missing you, as I am writing this letter my heart longs for you. I catch myself wondering about your heart, does it long for me as mine longs for you? Do you even miss my presence , do you even care? I LOVED YOU in caps, but you left me with a lower case goodbye. I wonder, did you travel the world like you have always wanted? I have seen some pictures, I liked them, then I have realised you have stopped following me back. I hope that you are happy, even though you completely shattered me. Do you remember the promises we made? They were whispered drunkenly in the middle of the night. You said " Out of all the people in the world, there is no one I would rather be with than you". Yet you left. You left me on the days where the sky was grey, and everything tastes like mashed potatoes. You couldn't stand by my side when the water started washing the bloody rivers running down my arms. You couldn't comfort me, hug me, and tell me that everything is going to be okay. Okay. I wanted to hear that word. Okay. Yes you are okay. Everything will be okay. Yet what you did was spew venom. Venom that got under my skin. Venom that I had to cut my arms over and over to get it out. You shattered me , when I was already broken. I always picked up your pieces, yet you didn't bother picking me up. I sometimes wonder if it was my fault? Was I irritating? Did I not listen? Was I blind, was I deaf? I truly don't know. And even though it breaks my heart seeing you with someone else, it brings me peace knowing that you are happy. Content. And with a watery smile,a heart filled of unspoken words and a heart filled with unshed tears, I bid you farewell. Farewell my friend. And as the first drop of tears started falling down my cheeks, I just want you to know that no matter where you are, and no matter what you have done, you stole a piece of me I am never getting back.