The 28(++ * n) Loves of My Life

reveurgam (60)in #love • 4 years ago (edited)

Love comes in many different forms, in different times and places, and this story shares as many of them as I can think of, be it for parents, friends, family or females; at home, in my neighborhood, from other areas, from other states, from other countries; in elementary, in secondary, in university and beyond; and acceptable or taboo.
hanging hearts made of natural material

The first love that I can remember having is the love for my parents.

The second love is for my sister.

The third is for most of my family members. I can only really think of one family member who was not nice.

The fourth is for my friends (and I include all of them, past and present, because I still love them).

The fifth is for my best friends, many of whom have moved on but I still love.

The sixth was a little girl who lived on my block, and she reciprocated until she abruptly moved away. She even chose me over the neighborhood bully when he asked her in front of me! I thought I found her, once, but no...:(

The seventh was a girl in 2nd grade who would tie my shoes for me (it was her kindness that got me). That love was not revealed to her.

The eighth were some girls in high school. There was the girl who asked me to be her boyfriend but I accidentally responded in a way that offended her when I was trying to be romantic. One I would give anonymous gifts to but never had the confidence to tell her because I was too shy, and one I dated briefly in 9th or 10th grade. I could name them, but I don't want to embarrass them.

The ninth was a girl from another part of town - whom I met at the party of a girl with whom I had a mutual infatuation via letters but didn't in person - and we dated off-and-on for the next few years.

The tenth was a woman from university that lived in a different part of Wisconsin and whom I dated off and on for many years. She was a real sweetheart!

The eleventh was the first woman I was engaged to, whom I'd met at an online get-together. We were even interviewed by a newspaper! That didn't work out, which was for the best as she couldn't keep her pants on.

The twelfth was a woman whom I'd had a hot relationship with in university. She tracked me down years later and got together, but it was very tempestuous so we parted ways but are friends to this day.

The thirteenth was a woman from Hawaii whom I met in Internet Relay Chat (IRC). I went to meet her there but, after the very first day, she lent me her car so I could enjoy Oahu while she worked, and she avoided me the rest of the time. After that, she got me banned from the IRC channel we met in.

The fourteenth was from Canada, and we also met through IRC. Actually, she'd seen me chatting with the previous woman and decided she liked me, so she reached out to me.

The the fifteenth was also from Canada and she was super sweet, and was on the run from a misogynistic husband, but I realized I wasn't mentally ready for marriage so I knew it would end up in misery for her. She was super-sweet - she even left me cookies in my fridge on the day she left while I was at work.

The sixteenth was a woman from Russia who'd married an American, and gotten divorced. But it was a hormonal romance and she wasn't nice - she dumped me on my birthday. :(

The seventeenth was my step-sister's daughters, who were such wonderful kids!

The eighteenth I met through a website and was a Hindu Indian who was partially handicapped by polio, but the cultural differences were too great.

The nineteenth was a Filipina I also met through a website but we couldn't sustain the spark remotely.

The twentieth, again from a website and we'd communicate via email, was a Russian (supposedly) who bilked me of money "for communication and translation fees". She sent me a nudie, which was so badly edited (her head on another body) that I knew it was a scam. After that, I gave up on international dating sites.

The twenty-first was my niece, whom I met as a toddler a few times before moving overseas.

The twenty-second was the sister of a guy I played AD&D with. She was something special, but I already had plans to move overseas by the time we met and was fully committed to the move. Also, she wasn't ready for a serious commitment, as she was going into the Peace Corps to Burkina Faso, Africa.

The twenty-third was a woman in Indonesia whom I was introduced to over the Internet by another woman I befriended over the Internet. After I moved there, it rapidly became apparent to me that, although we'd pledged to marry, it was going to be a very rocky and unhappy relationship. The first time I tried to break it off, she said she'd kill herself and I had to grab the knife from her to stop her. The next month, I tried again, so she did, too. :( Then I prayed for a month and found the answer in an English book as I was discussing the topic of love with my students, and so I told her God had said we couldn't stay together. She only threw her tea mug against the wall and tried to give me rules.

The twenty-fourth was a student whom I met one day in a classroom because her teacher was sick. For a month, almost every time I saw her, I could only say, "Hello," "How are you?" and "Good bye" because I was so afraid of rejection. I did that for a month! I was so elated when she gave me her phone number! We met before I was able to successfully end the relationship with the above woman, but after I had already committed to breaking up. She treated me very nicely and I was really smitten! The next year, on 3/14/03, we got married! Just shy of 14 years later, she died of hypoglycemia and stage 4 cervical cancer.

wedding picture
Ita's grave

The twenty-fifth was my daughter, Jasmine, on New Year's Day by caesarean section. She was very late coming out, so the lady across the street said she was busy doing her make-up. They tried to induce her to come out, but she was too shy. ;) She was small had to be in a special chamber for a couple of days and, after we took her home, I had to take her for walks in the sunlight to help her combat low vitamin D.

Ita and baby Jasmine

The twenty-sixth was my son, Iregi, 4 years, one month and one day later, who was also born by c-section. He was VERY big, even by American standards, gave Ita a fever that forced her to stay in the hospital even though her labor hadn't actually started, and had a stomach that was SO very strong! Unlike his big sister, he could drink more milk than Ita could make, so she had to drink juice from papaya and star gooseberry plants to increase her milk production.

Iregi, Ita & Jasmine