There is no love: 6 reasons to take a fresh look at the relationship.

For centuries, writers, artists and philosophers have tried to convince us of the existence of true love and the second half that is wandering around the world. C early years, our heads are stuffed with false ideals, and we happily skip through the minefield, methodically breaking hearts to ourselves and others. Sergei Balayan found six reasons why people start relationships. And they have nothing to do with the love for which the mountains are turning, drying the seas, waiting for decades and rushing under bullets.

1. Thirst for consumption
   
   It is the sense of ownership and the thirst for consumption that forces men to scour the gateways in search of a victim worthy to take their place among the acquired property: "Look, this is my Xbox, here I have a home theater. Yes, thank you for noticing, the apartment is three rooms. Here - a bathroom with a jacuzzi, a mini-bar, and here, by the way, a woman. Look, what a good woman. Do you like a woman? My".

Women are all the same, only the execution and the system of requests is different. Seeing the victim, suitable for social status and financial status, they jump, attack, release poison - and now a strong and independent man turns into a rag and henpecked, ready to do everything to ensure that his goblet did not pass to someone else. Click your fingers, and now the woman has such a fashionable accessory that you can brag about before everyone, a breadwinner from which you can pull everything like from a cornucopia: someone pulls gold and diamonds, someone - a soul, someone - Position in society. It's simple: yes, I am a thing, you must pay for ownership of me.

1. Boredom
   
   Boredom is the mother of all great achievements and epic foolishness. It's not at all necessary to go crazy with loneliness - you can, with a live partner, have an affair on the side with the goal of making variety in a boring life. With the development of information technology, it has become more than ever. It is enough to go online, track down a bored victim, and here - about anything unsuspecting the bitter becomes a participant in mockery of himself.

Network relationships are ideal in the emotional aspect: after all, when everything gets boring, you do not have to look into anyone's eyes, shifting from one foot to the other to find the right words, sniff, choke with tears. Just "roll", ignore, and that's it.

1. The fear of loneliness
   
   Man - animal social, from childhood accustomed to living in the herd. Subconsciously, everyone is afraid to be alone, and therefore is looking for someone who will be there even when all the others turn away from him; Of that, thanks to whom death alone and oblivion pass by. By the way, that's why most families try to have children as soon as possible, because if one of two people dies before, enjoying the last minutes of life next to a close person, then the second will certainly have to die solely in their own shit, and this does not want anyone.

2. Chemistry
   
   When we see an attractive creature, a crane opens up inside us, from which phenylethylamine begins to flow in the blood (you can call it PEA, like real scientists). PEA, in turn, forces us to resort to various tricks in order to win the attention and location of the passion. Then there are two options: either the indicated person makes it clear that we are not interested in it, in which case the crane closes again, or, on the contrary, shows reciprocity, and then the valve opens to its fullest.

The described chemical process is absolutely identical to what is happening in Sheldon Cooper's body when he sees a new edition of the Flash comics from the limited series. From the current situation Sheldon has two options: either temporarily stop going to your favorite store, until the whole series is sold and the storm of passion does not settle, or do everything possible to get hold of the desired collection of pictures. And now the goal is achieved, happy Sheldon holds the cherished comic book, passionately inhaling the smell of fresh printing ink. There is a ringing in my ears, a spinning in my head, fog in my eyes, weakness in my legs, trembling in my hands, pleasant warmth spreads all over my body. However, after a week or two joy and pride subsides, the ardor fades, friends before whom you can brag about your acquisition, end, the faucet closes, and the comic goes to dust on the shelf.

1. Aftertaste
   
   Unfortunately, the PEA resource in the body is limited. On average, this love potion lasts two or three years. Someone is draining their supplies in a couple of months, someone is missing for five years, but the average temperature in the hospital is about this. And now people who yesterday loved each other to a loss of heart rate, suddenly face an obvious fact: passion is gone, obviously, it is time to look for a new companion. If partners have at least some common sense, then something like this happens: they part, suffer for a while, and then take themselves in hand and, not having learned absolutely nothing from the happened history, sticking out their tongue, rush to skip to meet the next rake.

The second variant of the development of events assumes the existence of a common child, which gradually lures all the attention of their parents and, if their relationship was strong enough, can save the family from collapse. This is a mutual love for the child, a sense of responsibility before him. Although such relationships can not last forever - sooner or later the child is no longer able to contain the completely disintegrated and rotten feelings of parents, and family scandals, quarrels, trips to my mother, trips left and right, and finally - a divorce begin.

Well, finally, the third option - the most common. From passion there is no trace, the feelings have cooled down so much that physicists can safely rewrite their theories regarding absolute zero, but the partners are still together. The only reason is habit. The habit of lying under a comfortable heel, the habit of pulling juices, the habit of appearing in public together, and so on. Habit and weak character. After all, no, but stability. Toupey household conservatism. The fear of having to explain to everyone why you are today without your usual bracelet hanging out on your elbow. Fear of condemning views and cues in his address.

And, of course, pity. A pity for his partner, fueled by his brutal conceit: "Where is he without me? What will he (a) do without me? He will hang himself (a) without me, that's for sure. " On Earth live seven-odd billion people, and each imagines itself as special and unique. The only unique thing in a person is his egocentrism: everyone has his own.

1. The Dream
   
   Love is a dream that has been cultivated in us from the earliest years by tales, songs, films. A beautiful word in which you can wrap an animal desire to have sex, and with it a banal instinct of reproduction, managing losers who need to leave something behind them. Another embodiment of human unwillingness to call things by their proper names. An ideal that forces many people to spend years searching for the very one, the only one. Although most of them even do not have the patience or the strength to do this: they saw a good face, felt the itch between their legs - everything, I love you, let's never part. After all, hypocrisy is an inalienable feature of every inhabitant of this planet. And one of the virtues of hypocrisy is the ability to convince anyone, even yourself, to do anything. It's enough to just believe it, do it right, go all out - and now you've found that very soul mate, and it does not matter that you are 18 years old, and there are 7 billion potential applicants on the Earth. All that is needed for love - at least one of the above criteria. And in the case of a woman in general, only nyushnoy face is enough. Everything else - a rich inner world, romanticism, intellect and other snotty nonsense - can be thought through based on musical tastes, various horoscopes, favorite writers and other tinsel. And at home, as compensation for the ruined life and for adjusting the inner peace, you can also go to the woman a couple of times to visit the woman, and she will swallow with joy: beats - then loves, grandfathers said.

And when passion burns out, it's called "our love has moved to a new level." Funny to the loss of the pulse: the woman sits at home, for example, slaps her eyelashes into the window, tormented by alarms, and the man comes home all in lipstick and perfume, comes up with another excuse and goes to bed. A happy lover goes to the kitchen, drinks a glass of wine, swallows along with alcohol suspicions and resentment, and also goes to bed, still believing in children's ideals and trying to drown out the subconscious suspicion that something in her life went wrong.

No love.

If you are sitting now and reading this text with a malicious smile on your lips, firmly convinced that it is your happiness - an exception to the rules, my bow to you, you are a thing, a litter and a spineless mattress.

You die unhappy, often without realizing that happiness had to go in the opposite direction. Learn to call a spade a spade. Life will become much easier.