Do You Love Genuinely?

The problem is always that we mistake the idea of Love.

Sometimes in our relationships, we become clinging and grasping. We thought that is the way to show that we love that person or how love should be. Whereas actually it is just Attachment which causes pain. The more we grasp, the more we are afraid to lose, then, if we do lose, then of course, we are going to suffer.

Attachment says: You know, I love you, therefore, I want you to be with me and we will make each other happy.

Genuine love says: I love you, therefore, I want YOU to be Happy. If that includes me, great. If it doesn't include me, I just want your happiness.

And so, it is a very different feeling. You know, Attachment, is like holding very tight. But Genuine love is like holding very gently, nurturing and allowing things to flow and not to held tightly. The more tightly we hold on to others, the more we suffer. But it is very hard for people to understand that because they think that the more they hold on to someone, the more it shows that they care about them. But it is not, it is really just that they are trying to grasp at something because they are afraid that otherwise they themselves will be hurt.

Any kind of relationships which imagines that we can fulfill ourselves through another is bound to be very tricky. Ideally people would come together already feeling fulfilled within themselves and just therefore, appreciating that in the other. Rather than expecting the other to supply that sense of well-being which they don't feel on their own.

It will be a lot of problems, if you are expecting the other to supply which comes along with the projection of the romance when we project all our ideas, ideals, and desires and romantic fantasies, on to the other. Which the other cannot possibly fulfill once you get to know them, you recognize that it's not Prince Charming or Cinderella, it is just a very ordinary person who is also struggling. Unless one is able to see that, to like them as well as to feel desire for them and also to have loving and kindness and compassion for them. If not, it is going to be a very difficult relationship.

Most of my write ups, ideas or thoughts or contents are from books, blogs or own experiences that I find it interesting to share. The little things that remind us of our daily life and be gratitude towards life.

The color of your energy. Thank you steemit! Thank you!

Source: The story is from Evolve and Ascend's video and photo is from flickr.com.