Looking For A Soulmate? Here Are a few Reasons Why Some People Never Find their soulmates

in #love7 years ago (edited)

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Let's talk about soulmates.

I am very unhappy this morning. I made a video for all of you my sweetest friends and followers, but it won't just go through. I made a video titled

Why do people break up

But my friend's window phone has being a big issue, and just this morning after I tried uploading using his system, everything alright until power left the PC( sobs..).

But I still want to get something out there for all of you my family(followers) and friends. This is very important topic and I might not run it through in just one blog post. But let's see how it goes.

When I post about relationship and life which I have choose to be my niche, please note that mostly they are out of experience, these are things I have come to learn daily observing people or practiced myself.

Last year I spent about 2months plus taking a friend round the city of Abuja around religious backgrounds to find his soulmate. We saw a lot of ladies, but sadly this 38 year old friend of mine could not make a choice, uptil this moment as I speak to you, he is still unmarried.

Marriage and settling down becomes a major part of live every young man and woman passes through daily.

I mean marriage and not wedding, because most people often skip wedding this days.

When I was much younger, I use to fantasize about my wedding, and I wanted to have my wedding in my hotel. But them maturity came along. Perhaps many of us have these similar fantacies. Its not a bad idea.

For the purpose of this post, I will stick to why people fail to find a soul mate, and things to consider before looking for a soulmate.

I will also try as much to be tactical and elaborate on each point. We shall stick to five reason always.

Five Reasons Why People Couldn't Find Their Soulmates

I am a Christian, but I always love to try as much to limit my religious afliations when I make posts like this, however the truth remains that God is the originator of Marriage and when we put him in the middle of it, problems are often limited and solvable. So my first take on my people miss out is;

Doing things your way and Neglecting God.

Doing Things Your Way

We are all thinking and intellectual beings, we were created with the crave of independence and ability to distinguish wring and right, this lead to we having the gift of freewill. Oftentimes we let our free will get the best of us, unknown to us we want to do everything on our own, our ways, and in our pace. We are such fools to forget these inspired words

"I know the thoughts I have for you,.... To give you a future and a hope."

So why do you think that your ways are the best? Don't you think that the creator who knows the bones he used in creating you also knows the right one, the missing bone in your ribs. Remember "the hairs of your head are numbered" as he told Isaiah. This is to say that even the tiniest of details of our self the creator is quite aware of it.

would you not rather conclude that he knows the best for you and in a better position to give you a soulmate?

To further buttress why we miss our rib look through these words also;

"I know, oh Jehovah, that the way of man is not in himself, that it is not in man who walks to direct his steps". Jer 10:23.

If man can not direct his step, give me one reason why you feel he can get a soul mate himself.

So dear friend, get on your knees and talk to God(Jehovah) about your situation, tell him what you need, don't dictate to him, and go out there put your mind to work, he will locate you.

Yes, he will, but it won't happen when you are not ready, so this will take us to our second main point;

Be Ready

Be Ready
Now you can't go to your creator when you are not ready yourself. If an athlete wants to compete in a race he must first prepare very well. He spends all he can building, practicing, and making sure he is ready. In such scenery it becomes expectations meets preparation and then becomes a success.

Therefore, every man, every woman needs to prepare. You can't ask for a fish when you can only afford crayfish, you need to work hard to get the fish.

The point is; you need to become the kind of man you want for the kind of woman you want to get and the one God is preparing you for.

You need to be ready, financially, spiritually, emotionally, and physically.

To be financially ready means that you have the resources to take care of your basic need as a couple.

To be spiritually ready means you have to be spiritually sound either as a man or a woman in your service to your God(no matter your religion).

To be emotionally ready means you can control your emotions as a person and won't let it get the best of you no matter any situation. This willalso go with your psychology; you need to be mentally sound and thinking aright to communicate the right feelings to your soulmate.

To be physically ready means that you are healthy and can take Care of your self as a young man or woman with all basic lifestyle principles as regards health, cleanliness, and other physical and social vices.

So in all of this you need to be ready. I can't over emphasize the need to keep your mind ready. For you to understand you are letting someone into your life.

Being ready will make you create space for that person,help you accept that you are no longer alone.

Hence its time reduce some normal live activities you loved as an individual, if you will visit a friend prepare to visit together. If you will watch a movie get a ticket for two. This is simply getting ready.

You.can also have a form of premeditated thoughts, visualize yourself and your soul mate into he future, what will you d together? Where would you love to travel together? Will you eat together? Bath together? Answer these questions and more.

It will take you deeper into your personality and thus help you reflect on;

the kind of person to choose.

Who is My soulmate?

After you have talked to your father who is in the heavens, and you have put one your best to prepare all you can. Now is the time to wait patiently to get your soul mate. What does this waiting entails?

waiting entails that you put all your resources to work wisely as you look to get hooked up with your soulmate.

So you have known and understood yourself properly during your preparation process. Hence this will also lead you to understand the kind if soulmate you need in your life. What will understanding yourself and the kind of person you need in your life do for you?

Simply put, this will help you understand the kind of persons you will let into your life. The kind of persons you are attracted to and the kind of persons attracted to you too.

Here is the thing, if you claim to be someone who attract a certain kind of people to your life always, check yourself there is a reason why you attract such people, its not rocket science, then you will need some readjustment to attract the kind of people you feel they are right for you.

Before you decide your soulmate please look at the following questions;

what is my temperament? Which kinds of temperaments can I cope with? What attracts me to a partner or opposite sex? How well can this attraction last? What am I looking out for in my partner? What kind of person will I love to spend my life with? Does beauty, curves, and other physical attributes matter too me so much? What are the things I can over look in a soul mate? What are the things I can't overlook in a soul mate?

Give these questions considerable thoughts.

Because one of the reasons why people hardly locate their soulmate is;

giving so much credence to physical appearance.

Focusing on Physical appearance

Its true that beauty attracts, handsome people get noticed, but the truest beuaty is that of the heart, mind and character. Ostensibly, people often say "personality catches the heart"
I am aware that we all need to be attracted, but this physical appearance that just can't keep you calm is going to fade away.

when you are left with just the personality of your spouse in the future, what will you do?

Would you go about cheating? And truly, this us how so many people loose their soulmate looking at the beauty of the wrong person, yet ignoring their gift in front of them, sometimes since childhood.

This often is accompanied with;

expecting too much.

Over expectations

Some girls would say;

I want a man with a house, a man with a car, a man with the flashy life. I want a man very tall nice beard, and broad shoulders.

The guys too are not left out, it is true that we all want all these things, but we can't all get what we want.
*sometimes you've got to make these things together, and I think they should be cherished moments.

Everything you wanted can be created. In truth, many people gave missed their soulmates because they expected more than they saw. So they let it slide.

In this search, you have asked your creator, let him decide. I don't mind you should let just anything fly, no, all I am saying is be open to people, and let everyone in your life know their limit.

So keep your epectations on the normal side of life while setting your standard according to your principles of life and that which pleases your Creator.

keep Searching, continue waiting and Don't give up

Dear Friend,

I am glad that you read this article, however this it borne out of the desire to assist us as young ones as singles to the point where we find that special person. It does not matter how old you're. If you dim it fit to have a soulmate in your life, please don't give up. Better late than never.

There are a billion people who are yet to get a soulmate, you are not alone. Do the normal things you daily in life, and never forget someone is always watching, soon enough you will be rewarded with that single person meant for you.

Appendix
Pictures are from pixabay

Bible quotations from Revise Standard version ©2014 American bible society.

Copy Rights ©I.C Nelson 2018

Disclaimer
This is the writers perspective, and not professional advice, however you are responsible for any any misapplication.

Yours truly loved,

@iconnelly.

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There are a billion people who are yet to get a soulmate, you are not alone. Do the normal things you daily in life, and never forget someone is always watching, soon enough you will be rewarded with that single person meant for you.

The love doctor has spoken! 😁

Lol dear you are always hitting it!

You have done well. I really like the first point of doing things our way. We are madebto depend on God for our survival; anything short of this is OYO! We must not be wise in our own way, we are meant to acknowledge and Seek God for our help!

Yes, o supper agree with you big time bro!

Nice write-up. I especially liked the part where you said we need to be the kind of person you want to attract (paraphrased).

And your friend must be super selective not to have found a woman of his choice after so long.

Maybe you should give him clay and some water so he can mould one to his specs. Haha 😂

This is great, well if I'm to go by this post, I think I'm ready ☺ and on track. Hehehe. Awesome niche

@iconnelly,you said that your 38 years old friend is not yet married,could it be that it's because he dint know this things mentioned here? Lol

Anyways thanks a lot for this blog post ,I learnt that in finding a soul mate I should let God order my steps,I should be ready all round because God cannot give me what is beyound my capacity and I should overcome expectations!

You are good man in fact you deserve to be a love doctor. Nice work

@abuja-steem just upvoted this post. Help us to do more by upvoting this comment

Very educating. This is the summary of what i learnt: seek God's face, be ready, know what you want, don't be carried away by physical appearance
and don't over expect.
These shall guide me in choosing my soulmate.
But @iconnelly my question is , can one have more than one individuals to choose one's soulmate from since u said in one of your points that u have to decide while putting some things into considerations ?

Yes, its a world of over 7billion people, more than 3people may carry the traits ypu want, this is where you need to seek his face(God) the more. Take your time, dont base love on what you see and feel, get to know them properly, because what you see from afar is always different when you come closer.

Please dont compare them take your time, as you have time for each of them you will soon see a different and clearer picture. You can always start with just being friends with them too. Cox if you are caught double dating; you loose all.

Hope i answered ypur questions?

Everything needs God... Life without him is a failure only him can direct you to the one that is best for you.. But you have to do your part... Nice post dear

Very correct, we must do our parts as humans and leave the rest to him.

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