Your advice about character is sound. As for the purpose, roles and obligations, your mindset is too rigid. You don't need God for your marriage to be meaningful. And if a man is good at cooking, or a woman is good with financial matters, why not let them do what they're good at?

You put it very nicely yourself:

"That it worked for others doesn't mean it'll work for you"

Why is that, you think? Because people are different. I can assure you that a lot of people would be more happy in marriage if they ignored the gender roles you postulate.