3 Month Update

in #love4 years ago (edited)

It's been 3 months since my breakup. And science says that 3 months is about the time the average person needs to get over a breakup and honestly, I was kind of making that a big milestone. So I wanted to discuss how I'm feeling now.
https://blog.zencare.co/how-long-does-it-take-to-get-over-a-breakup/ (Here's a link to that article, and no it's not a scientific article)

I am feeling pretty good actually. I personally think it took me about 2 months to feel well enough to have moved on. I don't think this is too fast given the circumstances around my breakup and the fact that I kind of knew it was coming. And I'm not sure if I addressed this in the first break up post but, I really did just know. I knew that my ex did not feel the same way about me as I did him and I thought that it would get better but it just never did. I was mostly upset about our breakup because I thought of him as one of my closest friends and with further thought, I realized that because we had a quite amicable break up his friendship will always be there if I ever want to reconnect however at this current moment I really just have no desire for that.


Meme courtesy of PizzaBottle
I was also upset because I thought that I would never meet another partner but I've come to realize I am only 20, and the world is my oyster so a guy is going to come. I also realized that I kind of don't to be tied down by a serious relationship right now. And for the record, I definitely had these thoughts well I was with my ex. I was kind of scared that I was wasting my youth on a meaningless relationship and I kind of was. Even if we had gotten married which of course thought would happen -- I think I would have regretted not being able to date in my youth. I also think I would have regretted having a partner who was not very compatible with me. Though he was sweet and we had fun I do realize after getting back out there just a little that we were pretty incompatible and our relationship probably wouldn't have lasted much longer especially after graduation and especially coupled with the strain of long-distance. The bottom line is, I was never upset about ending our relationship because he just wasn't the best boyfriend.

And the crazy thing in all of this is that I don't hate my ex, I don't resent our relationship. I'm actually grateful for having experienced such a thing so early in life. And I'm happy that I had someone by my side throughout undergrad to keep me focused on my work. I also definitely don't think I would enjoy my new found freedom as much as I do now without knowing what it was like not to have it. I have also come to understand more fully that things that are meant to happen will happen and whether good or bad they turn us into the people that we are meant to be.

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