Life is too short

"Never say goodbye because goodbye means going away

and going away means forgetting"

My memories are quickly fading away as time flies past so I figured I would share it and write it down quickly. Now I've been a shy kid my whole life and this story takes place in eighth grade and this is the first and only girl I have ever been able to talk to confidently. In a guitar class last period of the school day this was not the first class we met in it was actually the third class we had shared, gym class eighth period the whole year, and an art class ninth period in the first quarter of the year, but it was the first class we had ever talked in and I don't think she or I had known the other existed till that moment. Thinking about it now it was a odd chain of events that had allowed us to meet but I wont go into detail there only that she talked to me first. After that I almost immediately fell in love with her she was just so nice and the pure confidence I felt when I talked to her.

 

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But I was too confident, and these events could have possibly doomed my self confidence for possibly the rest of my life and we don't talk anymore sadly. I bothered her with my bad jokes and little pranks cause there was no social wall between me and I thought it was funny but now thinking about it it really wasn't at all and it was just dumb. There was nothing holding me back and I thought she liked it honestly but now I see and I try to not act like that ever again. There's no way to change what I did at this point in life but I still remember some of the best moments we shared.

There was music playing in the class and everyone was dancing in the small room, I walked up to her and asked her if she wanted to join my band (:p). She kindly rejected it saying she already was in a band which I had accepted pretty quickly and got over it but my band never really did anything. But after rejecting my band proposal she says something around the lines of lets dance and she starts dancing, although the description might suck it was really funny and cute.

It was winter and this was the last time I talked to her for more than like 20 seconds, I ended up walking her home almost but I had to go home half way in because it was getting late. One of the first things that happens is we walk past a little pile of snow and I tell her that its almost as tall as her and she laughs and tells me that I'm not that much taller than her and she's not short. Further on into the walk I tell her something about how I could probably push her into the snow and she says I probably couldn't cause she plays football I try but she ends up pushing me after a while and we are both laughing. After that I tell her I have to go and start walking the other way and smiling she says bye to me and on my way home I'm so happy. 

I almost never talk to her again I don't know what happens but I was almost never able to talk to her again and I quickly lost every ounce of confidence I ever had around her but I do try around the high school years but now she's gone. So long my almost lover