About the "friendzone" so many people love to hate

This post is going to be a bit messy,just unloading some random thoughts and observations I made in my life (mostly about my own behavior).So if it strikes a nerve,cool down,keep reading before you get angry.

So let's say that one random day you stumble upon the cutest face you have ever seen so far,a really beautiful person (on the outside,you don't know them yet after all). The image burns in your brain and you find yourself thinking of that person a lot. Time goes by and you get the chance to get to know them, share thoughts,dreams,opinions. And the more you get to know that person,the more you like them,not just their cute face but everything about them.

One day you take the risk and be bold about the attraction you feel only to get the door shut in your face.And you keep repeating this attempt at hitting on them at every opportunity you get,getting the same results all the time.Stop right there and think about what the hell you are doing.

Yeah it might hurt at first,but guess what?You hurt the other person too, right when a frienship was starting to establish between you. Now you have a decision to make.Do you value this person and their presence in your life?Do you accept their friendship?Or do you value the lust you feel about them more than that person?Take a step back and think about it. What will hurt you more?Losing a friend you love and trust just because you also lust after them,or having a great friendship with a person you already find to be amazing on all aspects? No matter what you choose,it's up to you. But if you decide to destroy the friendship because you cared more about your lust than you cared about the other person,don't ever claim that you loved them and really cared about them and that they broke your heart. If you decide to stay and build a strong friendship, don't put your lust above the friendship and try to pressure someone to feel differently about you when they don't.In the end,you end up hurting your friend a lot more than the "rejection" hurt you. It was not a rejection of you as a person,rather than the rejection of the idea of having a different kind of connection than what you already had.

Keep in mind, friendship is not a cheap settlement or a consolation prize. It takes a lot of trust and acceptance,even love (not the romantic kind but it's not of less value) to build a friendship and a lot more to keep it alive. So don't treat a friendship as lesser than romantic/sexual relationships or as something shallow and of cheap value. And most of all,don't hate the other person for not wanting to have a romantic/sexual relationship with you,it takes two people to have any kind of relationship and all participants should be there by their own free will. You would not want a relationship where one person is with you only because you guilt-tripped them about it or because you made them feel like they have no other choice,it is doomed to fail spectacularly. So enjoy your friendship with an amazing person and shut up,stop complaining or be ready to get kicked out of their life permanently,no second chances this time,they already gave you plenty of chances so appreciate what you have or get out and stop hurting them.