How you can control the behavior of a child
The upbringing of a child may seem like a daily conflict between two different desires! Karim, who is two years old, is constantly ceasing to attract his mother's hair ... A small Sarah takes a knife from the kitchen and wants to play it out! Three-year-old Mustafa screams loudly at the supermarket because his father refused to buy his candy! When and how can you set limits so that you can control your child's behavior?Discipline is a big and vague question mark for many parents.
Loving your children does not mean letting them do whatever they want at all times. A child who knows his limits feels more secure and has more acceptance among people because he knows well that he must take care of others. Discipline not only prevents children from the physical dangers they may be exposed to, but also teaches them the right behaviors that they will need to practice later in life so that they can integrate into society.
Proper planning
advises you d. Hurait Ahmed - Psychiatrist - You need to understand the various stages of growth your child is going through so that you can plan in advance for an effective way of dealing with his or her dental age, and to avoid dealing with the child in difficult situations that you may encounter. Dr. It is not realistic to expect your child not to touch things. A child likes to discover the things around him. So, so that you can secure your home from the mess of your child, remove all valuable and dangerous things away from him. Always put toys in hand so you can immediately replace them with things you do not want to tamper with. And suggests d. For example, if you hold your child with a knife, say to her gently, you hold her hand. This is a knife you throw things out ... you want to play ... well ... this is a game you can play with. " If you do this, the child will tell you that there are games that are suitable for playing and others that are not suitable for that.
In addition, children have a brief period of attention, so when you go to a restaurant or visit a knowledgeable home, take a few toys with you to make your child laugh. If your child gets bored with a game, give it another game. "Tell your child before you enter the restaurant in a nice way. We will have a good time here ... we are here to sit at the table and eat and have fun ... If you get out of the chair, you will lose everything," she said. joy! I want you to keep sitting ... I will surprise you every five or ten minutes with a game of games. "
How do you understand your child?
How many times have you heard this saying "If you do not stop ... I'll ask you to get the policeman to jail! Some parents resort to violent threats to control the rebellious child. Even if you do not seek such threats with your child, you may encounter those who volunteer as a kind of threat, such as intimidation by doctors who inject any rude child with monsters that will kill any child who does not sit quietly! "The threat does not solve things. All you do is scare your child, but will he learn something? When you raise a child, the highest priority must be the distinction and distinction between right and wrong behavior. " Therefore, Dr. Houria recommends stopping any wrongdoing done by the child with a simple word or words that the child can understand, such as say "no" or "enough" or "come here" and then explain to him later: "My hair hurts me when I hate it ... but You can play with this doll "or say to him:
If you are ordering something for your child to try to formulate in such a previous picture, it is better than the image of the request or vague phrases that the child can misinterpret or ignore. For example, do not tell him "do not jump on the couch" while you should say to him, "Please get off the couch." In both cases, you will find your child still resentful and resentful, but at least you will have brought him the information. Warns d. It is a fairy tale that negative or degrading statements can be frustrating for the child, so you should avoid him or tell him: "I told you this before ... you must be stupid."
Non-verbal communication is also more important than what you tell your child. The expressions of your face, the tone of your voice and the movements of your body all lead to the delivery of your feelings for the child and so says d. "If the mother is anxious, depressed, or nervous at times, the child will mimic these behaviors. We have to be gentle and neutral in our emotions, even if we tell our children no, we should never be angry or cruel. We tell him "no" in the sense that parents when addressing their children should be more assertive than angry. "The child can understand you ... so if I feel scared, I think all adults are terrified and horrible," she added.
As your child grows older, you have to change the rules you set for him, but the basic principles leave him as he is. "If you say no, it is not ... whether you are dealing with a young child or a teenager, but before you say no, you have to think about the consequences," Dr. Houria said. "When you say something, you must make sure you can do it." You can sometimes relax when your child is sick, anxious or sad. "
temper tantrums!
All parents know that young children are irritated. Their abilities still do not match the degree of independence they crave, which makes them frustrated when they are restricted or when their wishes are not met. They also acquire language skills that enable them to express their feelings well. So when your child begins to scream or behave in an unbalanced way, some education experts suggest that you use a method called "duration of exercise" or "time out". Dr. Houria says that "the period of cessation of activity" is to remove the child from the place full of excitement and play and put him in a place where he is under observation. I also give him the game or the thing that caused him this distress and anger and Ijalit sitting without any comment or boycott from you to calm down on his own, and then tell him after that you will talk to him about the cause of the problem that bothered when it is quiet.
Dr. Houria stressed the importance of parents controlling their emotions so as not to make the situation complicated. "If the father or mother screams at the child, the child will grow up screaming, and if they become more nervous, the child will also become more nervous," she says. Thus, the message you will understand to your child through your application of the "duration of exercise" method is that anger will not help and that you will not get your attention if you do so because this behavior is unacceptable. " When your anger is over, talk quietly to him about the cause of his anger.
If the child expresses his anger in a public place such as the supermarket or the cinema, do not lose your calm. If your attempts to calm him do not succeed, bring him home immediately. The message that we are reaching here is that shouting will not make it get what it wants.
As for hitting children, parents should remember that you should never hit a child just because you are angry. Unfortunately, there are many serious cases that resulted from violent parental discipline during anger !! For example, a single slap on the face can endanger your child's eyes and ears, and the violent attraction of arms and legs can lead to joint dislocation.
Do not lose your temper!
Raising a child requires energy and patience, which are difficult to achieve if you are under severe stress, so you must maintain your health and mood. If you feel tired or tired, take some time to nap or enjoy a refreshing bath. Says Dr. "When you feel tired and tired, give someone else care for your child until you regain control." She also says that while many parents feel guilty because they devote some time to themselves, it is very necessary to be a virtuous mother, and also a requirement of sound education. "Your interest in yourself is the only way you will be able to take care of others later," she says.
Finally, educating a job is no less difficult than any other job, so you should not do it by listening to others, or by imitating the education on which you grew up. Educate yourself through books, magazines, and the Internet, so you can get to the latest techniques and advice on raising children. When you understand why your child is behaving in a certain way and how best to deal with her, you will be more calm and ready to face such behavior. Life with a young child may be draining your patience, but it should not turn into a never ending conflict. It is an educational experience for both mother and child.