What if your dream is denied by someone around you?steemCreated with Sketch.

in #life5 years ago (edited)

If you have a dream, what would you do?

What would you do if everyone around you was telling you to be more realistic and give up your dreams?

What if they want you to make more "informed decisions" and take traditional career routes?

Please make sure you ignore them and reject them.

Hold your life firmly in your own hands so you can focus on your dreams.

This is the only way. Because in our life, there will always be people who won’t agree with you, there will always be a lot of negative people in this world, if we listen to their opinions, we will not only never realize our dreams, but also slowly become them!

This is a story of my friend:

He is now working as a cashier, his family doesn’t want him to go to college. And he wants to be a fashion designer. He has set goals for his life, and try to save money to achieve it.  

But in the world he lives in, everyone wants him to find a steady job, find someone to settle down with, form a family, even his girlfriend feel that way. He has never met anyone who supports his dream, and now he dare not and does not want to talk to others about his dreams.

But he still wants to work in the fashion industry, he wants to marry someone who will support him, although he does not want to get married so early.

He also knows that the decision to decide his goals and dreams is entirely in his hands, but with all these "real world" speeches that he gets, he tends to doubt himself.

How can he remain loyal to himself and stay motivated?

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After listening to his story, he has a dream and he is ready to take risks and change his life just to make it come true.

He knows what he wants, and he has a plan, and he's willing to do more than most of us would like to do.

However, he doubted, because his dream was considered unrealistic by even his closest people.

But I want to support him, not only because he has trust in me and tells me his story, but also because in him, I seem to see a lot of people's shadows, compromise again and again.

“Having a dream is never a bad thing, not to mention you are still fighting for your dream, even if no one supports you, you also have to work hard to achieve it. Wish you become a better self, you work hard so that your dream can be realized, perhaps it might be a tearful failure, but you have also grown into a strong fighter.

I don't know if you're going to be a fashion designer, but I know you're never going to be a cashier hiding in the corner for the rest of your life.” This is what I said to him.

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Have you ever had a problem like this?

Got rejected, no one agrees with you, and even you started to doubt yourself. I can say that no matter what others say, the greatest enemy is not an external factor, but suspicion, doubt is the enemy, a despicable enemy hiding in the depths of your mind.

But we have all had doubts, and they are inevitable.

Sometimes, the contrast of reality is good, because you need to be able to analyze whether the dream can be achieved.

But if the only thing that stops you is fear and doubt, not some insurmountable obstacle, then all you need to do is eliminate those fears and suspicions.

Why? Because of suspicion, as simple and harmless as it first seemed, it can enter your subconscious mind in a way that protects you, into the depths of your heart, like some kind of chronic poison that seeps into your body.

Doubt will always linger in your mind, and if you obey, it will eventually conquer your dreams.

When that happens, doubt is stronger than you realize. When you make tough decisions, whether you want to continue your studies or go overseas to pursue your dreams, your dreams will fail because of the doubts in your mind.

When you think of yourself, your self-image will not be the person you want to be, but the person someone else wants you to be.

Doubt will make you work in the job you hate, just because you're afraid to do what you really want to do.

Doubt will make you with someone who doesn't recognize you because you don't think you deserve a better deal.

How can you dispel your doubts on the way to the pursuit of your dreams?

Since suspicion is so insidious, it's not easy to beat completely, I'll share three simple tips for you, but each step is more difficult than it sounds:

First, find the doubt. Doubt gains it’s power mainly because it is in our subconscious, we do not know its impact on us. Instead, we must bring it to the forefront of our minds. This means focusing on our thoughts and trying to look for those misgivings and negative thoughts as they appear. Those who say, "I can't do this." Maybe it's unrealistic.

"If you are consciously aware of these doubts, you can seize them and defeat them."

Second, suppress doubts. Once you realize these doubts, don't keep thinking about it, don't let it spread in your mind!

Third, replace it with something positive. Now you have suppressed doubts and replaced it with positive ideas. Believe me, it works: Think about yourself, "I can do this! Other people did it, and so can I. Those I used to suspect fear did not succeed in stopping me.” You've got to stay vigilant, it's a process of constant pursuit of dreams, not a one-off thing.

Even if you've killed the first or second wave, doubt will continue to return like an undead legion, and you can't let them thrive and beat you.

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When facing those external negatives, people who don’t agree with you, friends, family, and pundits tell you to stop dreaming and go back to reality, you have to learn to stop them.

Or, try to make a part of the effort to yourself, let those people cheer for your determination, you have to prove that those people are wrong!

If someone often disappoints you and keeps making you feel like you can't do something, you can consider removing them from your life. It may sound overdone, and it may be really overdone, but the truth is that having a life full of negative people will drag you to their level and stop you from doing what you want to do.

I'm not saying you should never see your parents again (if they're opponents), but I say you should pick your friends carefully.

Instead, surround yourself with positive, inspiring people. If you have such a friend, you can do anything.

Here are some suggestions:

  1. Keep your ultimate goal in mind.
  2. Get a clear picture of the way you end up wanting to make your dreams come true.
  3. Know where you're going to be and how you'll feel.
  4. Know exactly what it takes to succeed in your dreams.
  5. Stay focused and don't be distracted by other goals or pursuits.
  6. Celebrating any success, any achievement you make, no matter how small, it is something to celebrate.

Really, your dream will grow as if it were a child, not a leap-forward development.

Every step is something worth celebrating, and if there are enough steps, you will reach where you want to be.

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