3 Things You Must Know After 30
We often say that when we are young, we should not be afraid to make mistakes. The main psychological crisis when adolescence is to face different people that playing different roles and find their real role to form a stable self-identity.
In other words, before the age of 30, we can try different things to know what we really want, what really suit us, so that we have a clearer understanding of our future life.
So, after the age of 30, what are the things that we need to know?
Know your life goals or direction
In university, the biggest challenge we face is not academic, but boredom because we found that we have a lot of spare time, but we don't know how to use them. Because of lack of goals, this spare time has brought us greater stress and trouble.
After entering the society, the biggest challenge we face is not the fierce competition between people, but the confusion. Don't know what suit you, or what kind of person you want to be with. A lot of people are not afraid to devote, but afraid not knowing the reason of devoting.
So this is the real value of the goal, and when you know what you really want, all the efforts you've made will have the value.
Objectively speaking, the things that everyone goes through every day are not much different. For example, the vast majority of people are hard working, will feel great pressure, but some people will feel frustrated and helpless, and some people can inspire a greater morale. The biggest reason is they don’t know what they want.
When you know why you need to work hard, all the effort and frustration will have a meaning, it will become worthwhile. After the age of 30, if you know exactly where you are headed, you will live your life with more passion.
Learn to give up
The important thing is not to get as much as possible, but is to get what you want.
Many people think a happy life, is to get as much as possible. In fact, when we have a deeper understanding of life and the experience of life, we will find that the key to happiness is to abandon things and objects unrelated to the goals and focus on being ourselves.
It's like when we go to restaurant, some people think that the more they eat, the more satisfied they will be. But we know that what really satisfy us is the quality of the food, which is a better experience.
After the age of 30, we will discover that on one hand, our thoughts are mature, but on the other hand, we will realize our limitations.
For example, no matter what kind of personality you are, an extrovert or an introvert, there are advantages, deficiencies and shortcomings. No matter how smart you are, there will be something that you don’t know.
So, the key is to allocate your time, focus on your own interest, or the things that really matter to you, and for other things, no matter how tempting they are, you must learn to give them up.
Sometimes, giving up is for the better.
Handle your own psychological boundaries
Sometimes, we will have some "savior" mentality, especially when you see people around you encounter problems or trouble, and you hope to help them free from their problem.
Such a kindness is indeed a virtue, and we can experience a sense of value from such altruistic behavior. But we need to have the ability to help others. But if in order to help others, you hurt yourself or even lost your own direction and place the value of others life on top of yours, then this is a really big problem.
Help others and be responsible for others is two completely different things.
The so-called psychological boundary problem, is to let oneself clearly understand, which is belong to you and be responsible for it; which is to belong to others and you cannot be responsible for others.
The clearer a person's mental boundaries, the easier it is to get the most out of your heart, so that you can live yourself a better life and experience the goodness in life. At the same time, positive quality is contagious and influential, when you can truly feel happy and satisfied, your body will emit an intangible influence, that will influence each of us to learn to love ourselves, learn to love yourself before anyone else can love you.
After the age of 30, it is necessary to understand that the real help to people around, is to make each other a personality independent person.
Of course, life is complicated, 30 year old is just another stage of the beginning of life, we have to learn and comb with a lot of things.
But as long as we maintain a positive and a growing mindset, constantly improving ourselves, our life will be much closer to our expectations.
Hi @walkinharmony, wow I like your writing style and the topic was more than interesting to me as I just turned 30 😜! I very much liked the "learn to let go" abstract! Thank you for your effort to write it all down 👍🏼!
Thanks @travellove! I'm glad you like my post :)
Absolutely man! Most people by the time they're 30 should have a goal or career (a direction or sense of purpose) in life, and essentially should have figured themselves out enough to understand when to throw in the towel (as a definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over end expecting different results).
The development of personal boundaries and figuring out where psychological ones lie by undergoing stress and learning to deal with stress is incredibly important, sometimes people have not figured out these boundaries and end up having 'mid-life crises'.
All in all an incredibly well written post :) and to sum up, I couldn't agree more with those 3 things that people really should know when they are in their 30's.
Thanks! I believe that even before 30's, we should know what we want to do with our life. There are still many things for us to learn even after 30's :)
Very good what is explained here back to the man
Thanks :)
ATS token i.c.o offering free 75 tokens worth 10 $ , here is the link
https://steemit.com/ico/@kingjan/ico-for-authorship-com-tokens-is-open-for-investors
Resteemed your article. This article was resteemed because you are part of the New Steemians project. You can learn more about it here: https://steemit.com/introduceyourself/@gaman/new-steemians-project-launch
I really think this article is great like post upvote ;) and you also upvote me please
This post has received a 0.52 % upvote from @drotto thanks to: @banjo.
Exactly you say it right. I am now exactly 30 years old. My first baby born on my 30 as a plan. Life is diffirent now. I realized life is beautiful and satifying.
Thanks :) Even though I'm not in my 30s yet, I can feel the difference between 20s and 30s.
Interesting :) Nicely written post @walkinharmony!
Congrats on the rewards you made on this post :) Talk soon.
Thanks! Appreciate the drop by :)
Only a pleasure :)
We should engage in each other's content more often! Talk soon :)
Guess what.. I'll be 30 in a couple of months, and I have already been experiencing and thinking about all that you've mentioned in your post :) Very well written and very true indeed!
Just to add... I believe one more thing that we need to do when we cross the "30" barrier is to NOT look back at what we've left behind.. we need to be honest to ourselves and follow a mindset quite similar to the pirate's code in POC where Johnny Depp says, "He who falls behind shall be left behind." -- We will have reasons and episodes from our past that would want us to go back repeatedly, something that could have very well been the reason of you not being able to excel in your life... After 30, we need to be absolutely clear inside our head that the only road we need to be on, is the one that leads ahead, that leads to our destination, our goals.. regardless of all the obstacles that might be part of that long and, apparently, difficult journey. But we cannot keep doing back and forth with ourselves at an age, where we need to be honest to our physical and mental capabilities and all that is left inside of us... That energy and enthusiasm is only going to have a downward trend here onwards folks, so we need to know where are we investing ourselves in --- is it that bright and successful future and all those milestones that we want to achieve and very well have the potential to? Or is it a place related to our past where we already have been so many times before, but haven't yet gotten our break yet? If we do not have a clear answer to this simple question by 30, trust me, we will be at the same crossroads a decade later, too.
Yeah! Absolutely agree! The past is in the past, all we can do is keep moving forward, the past has become part of our memories, no point going back to the past. And also we must know our direction before 30, it's better if we know our direction as early as possible. If we don't, it will be the same cycle in 40.