A Day in the Diary of a Dying Man (Aug 11)
All of a sudden the clock is ticking…The timer that is counting the rest of my days. It ticks louder with every day, every hour that passes. I fight off the panic. What should I do with the infinitely precious time I have left?
Should I let myself drift into the comfortable numbness of just being, just absorbing. Meditating on the amazing wonder and beauty that is this best of all possible worlds.Or should I make a last ditch attempt to do something worthwhile with the unique skills I have been given but have never realized? And God how I wish I had realized! If I had money it would be easy and obvious. I would compile a bucket list:
- Sail the Pacific Ocean
- Fish for salmon in B.C
- Fly a biplane
I cant go on…it hurts!
It strikes me the one inescapable journey I do have before is that into a wheelchair. One of the few rock solid certainties of my life.All of a sudden, all that i have not done becomes horribly real. All those things I put off, waiting for the time to be right. All those chances I didn’t seize, all those doors I didn’t push. I made the mistake of thinking it would all come to me.
But I have today, for which I feel truly blessed. So many have so little. God, I am so lucky not to be in pain, not to be hungry, to be warm in my bed, and to be free of oppression and the threat of violence. And most of all I have the most wonderful loving caring people about me.
Wow…I have just written myself happy!
Thank you diary :-)
Duncan Cross, Isle of Wight, UK
Diagnosed with MND or ALS 10 December 2016
Please follow me for more
Written with StackEdit.
Thank you for your generosity in sharing your journey with us, @ukblogger. It is an inspiration (and a kick-in-the-pants reminder) to live while we can. I feel for you, Duncan. Not pity, just love and compassion. I wish you all the best.
Many thanks for your support @Pinkyh60. My main aim here is to encourage those not yet faced with their own mortality to realize, this life is not a rehearsal. Don't wait for the time to be right..it never will be..do it now!
Hey good luck with everything. I saw your post in steemology and am following you now. @kbargold
Many thanks.
Writing it out sure makes it clearer, doesn't it? Can I ask (and you don't have to answer) what sorts of things you notice more clearly, appreciate more dearly, and what gives your heart a little burst of hope/joy/peace as you step into this part of your life? Thoughts are with you, and thank you for posting.
mmm..making me think..Which is good. I notice more those people wasting their valuable existence on pettiness. I can still walk, and every day that I can I give thanks. I am increasingly in love with the blue sky, the sea, the wind and the trees. I feel so fortunate that I have time to stand and stare, and eyes for the beauty and wonder of the natural world..My heart is filled with joy at the kindness people show me. All quite enlightening. Thanks for the prompt Steemitpatina :-)
my thoughts are with you. This really make me think. I guess we all need to learn to count our blessings.
nice post buddy , looking forward for good post from you
Simply Great Information and Presentation
Simply Great Information and Presentation