These steps will help you to listen well:
1-Merge: how do people know that you listen to them and understand them? Mainly, it happens throughout the way that you look like. During their talk, they express their feelings, complaint, grumble and they talk about wrong things. Your mission is to submit an audible and visual proof that their talk is logical for you (even it isn't logical).
2- Reboot: reboot is a form to submit feedback. It means to repeat some words which the others used. It gives a clear signal that you were listening well to them.
3- When people end their talk, collect information about the meaning of their talk and ask questions of clarification. These questions can start with (where- what- how- when).
4- Summarize which you listened: To make sure that you and persons you can't stand already understood the experience, give them a summary of which you listened from them.
5- Emphasize information: after listening well, make sure that the people expressed the problem completely. Ask: anything else?
References: Dealing with People You Can't Stand- Dr. Rich Brinkman & Dr: Rick Kirschner.