From the ages of 20 to 24 I spent a lot of time with a group of wonderfully hedonistic friends. At many of the parties (that happened quite regularly) it wasn't unusual for there to be play rooms set aside, some for BDSM, some for just plain play time, and audiences could be invited back if you wished. It was awesome.

Naturally, there was a lot of skinny dipping in their pools as well.

Bathing suuUit? What is this bathing suuUit you speak of?
~Everyone there

I was affectionately called "Naked Nikki" because, being the eager person that I am, I was always the first one naked and in the pool, signaling the no pants dance. Also, alliteration is fun.

One such party night, I was in the pool, wonderfully drunk and nude as the day I was born. Myself and about 10 people were swimming around and talking to others standing around the side. I had noticed one friend, who had previously stated she had a rough day, drinking and talking with a couple people while sitting naked in a chair. Nothing too out of the ordinary, but I did hear her husband say to be careful. She had mixed a hard liquor into her wine, and she is diabetic.

Anyway, I did a couple headstands... a backflip or two, floated around and enjoyed the cold pool. That was when my eye was drawn back to her place in the shadowy corner. Her head was in her chest and her cup had spilled, clutched in her hands.
Absolutely not unusual for the parties, which is why no one really thought anything of it and let her rest. Except this was only her first or second drink.

I bailed out of the pool and gave her a shake.

Nothing.

Yelled her name in her face.

Nothing.

Gave her a hard pinch.

Nothing.

... Oh, shit.

I began yelling for her husband as I tried to rouse her. She was coming around for a few seconds, mumbling and passing back out, slurring her words like she had drunk a handle. Not. Good.

He came running over and helped me get his wife up, we each took an arm, and began carrying her inside. Now, as brazen as this group can be, there was a bit of an unspoken rule of respect where you usually didn't wander into the main parts of the party disrobed. There were frequently new comers and friends of friends that you don't really want to traumatize with a stampede of bare ass and bobbin' bits.

So you can imagine the attention it drew when two naked women and a rather concerned looking husband begin slopping water through the house. We were able to get her to the bathroom where I put fingers down her throat and got her to vomit a couple times while an ambulance was called. She finally started to come around after what felt like eternity.

We then carried her to the couch and sat her down. She was still slipping in and out of consciousness. There was only one thing left to do, get her dressed before the ambulance arrived and found a naked woman in the middle of a crowded room. That... doesn't look good on anyone.

Between the two of us we were able to get clothes on her while a lot of people watched, worried and scared for her well being. I was knelt at her feet, still showing the whole room what I'm workin' with, putting on her socks, when there was a rap at the door. The ambulance and the escort officer.

RUN, IT'S THE FEDS!

The last thing the room saw of me was a pale, Nikki shaped blur slipping across the wet floor and launching herself out the back door into the dark safety of the night.

On the other side of the door I found a round table in session as I lit a well earned cigarette.

"So the motion carries?"

The whole group nods and turns to me.

I looked at them, quite befuddled. Then a cheer erupted, glasses raising.

"SAINT NAKED NIKKI!"

Holy shit, I just earned my sainthood!

And I was henceforth known as such.

Our diabetic friend ended up being just fine, if not a little embarrassed. And I have spent the rest of my drinking years looking after other drunks. It is my job now.

Well, that and being naked.

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