A Full Circle Moment
Today, I helped my brother start his life over again for the umpteenth time. Even though I am 14 years younger, I have always managed to take care of him. However, that is a story for another day. I just wanted to mention that to say I was having a rough day. It is hard to help someone who can barely help themselves. Especially, when it is just a cycle that seems to repeat itself every few years. I am hoping this is the last time, but I am not naive enough to put all my hope into it. After a frustrating day dealing with him, I experienced a full circle moment.
When my mom and I got back to her house, she asked me to check the oil in her truck. It has been giving her trouble and due to her disability, she is unable to work on it herself. Luckily, my dad taught me from an early age how to do self-maintenance on my vehicle. As I was opening the hood, my niece (my brother's daughter who lives with my mom) popped her head outside to see what I was doing.
I told her I was going to check the engine oil for mimi (what she calls my mom), and told her to come watch and I would teach her how to do it. I began by explaining that my dad (her papa) had taught me when I was about her age. He wanted me to know how to do it so I could be self-sustainable. Even though I was a girl, he taught me to be very independent. As I was explaining and walking her through the steps, I could not help but get excited when I saw how interested she was in it. She even helped me!
When it was all said and done, I could not help but think back to when my dad taught me this same skill. It was such a full circle moment for me. Since my dad has passed, I have had a difficult time dealing with it. Tonight, it was as if he were speaking directly through me. It was almost like he was right there with me and I was a little girl again. It was a beautiful moment that I was able to share with my niece. I will forever be grateful for the way he raised me. I hope to be able to teach my niece to be as independent as my dad taught me to be. Those few moments spent with her made my whole day.
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It's interesting how those little things come back to you at unexpected times. You're doing something and that memory just pops into your mind.
It's nice when its a good memory that makes you happy. I hate when it happens and it makes you sad.