How I met with ALS ?( Amiyotrofik Lateral Skleroz)

3 Days ago it was World ALS ( Amiyotrofik Lateral Skleroz) Day and It brought me back the bad memories in to my head. It was 2014 and I was in Germany for Studying in Civil Engineering Major in Berlin Technical University. There was a hype going on named Ice Bucket Challange at that time I thought what was the purpose of it ? In Summer I went back to Turkey to visit my family and make a little holiday.

In first week of my visit I noticed that my father has a small limp while he was walking. He was a huge giant man so I thought maybe it is because of his overweight. I insisted him to go visit a doctor after couple of weeks. He started forgetting things and started to move slowly. I suspected dementia or alzheimer after thousand of checkups doctors said Doctors diagnosed him with ALS. Even doctors in Turkey had a lot of idea about the disease at that time. I felt devestated I convinced myself universe was making a sick joke to me. I was clueless about this disease if I didn't watch the ice bucket challange videos and now my father was diagnosed with this trendy disease.

After the diagnosis I felt so stressed because nobody could able to give me how will this disease will proceed. Only think I know is it is uncurable but you know Human beings are talented to able to lie themself so I lied to myself I become a little Polyanna.

After my holiday I needed to go back to Germany for continuing my education , because maybe some of you know there is a mandatory Military service in Turkey for people 18 and above. So I need to change my school if I want to support my family in this hard process.

After couple of months I decided to go back to Turkey to support my mother and father because I was the only child. I felt like it was my duty and I couldn't stay in Germany like nothing happened. Therefore I wasted my 4.5 year investment I quited the university and came back to Turkey.

After couple of months I can clearly notice the change on my father both behavioral and physical. It was unbearable to see my role modele my childhood hero to see in this situation. But thanks to the male role society gave me I needed to maintain my calmness and be the strong guy. I burried so much feelings during this process. Ofcourse my father never accepted the severity of his disease. I tried to explain to him his disease is Lethal and uncurable. As I told he was a guy like mountains . He was unyielding.

We had financial problems at that time My mother is a retired french teacher and my father was a retired Jeology Professor from a Turkish University. So I started to work to support my family in this hard process. After 4 Months My father was not able to walk without his cranes and the disease was proceeding rapidly. ALS was determined to tear down the man I admire and love.

In 5th month it affected his ability to speak. His hands were trembling and I can hardly communicate with him. While I was struggling with all those I was working for university exam in Turkey in order to start some university again. But my father never lost his joy in this disease he continued to be the joy of the family even in his death bed. I supressed so many feelings during this. Therefore I'm strongly thinking that this piece of writing will help me.

In 9th month of his disease He was completely immobilized and I started to pray god to please take my father fast in to your side . Because watching my Role model in this situation was really hard for me.

After these months I was depressed I couldn't leave the house single day and now I was thinking of quiting university education , but My father was an academician he was so obssesed with it. So even in his bed he talked me out of it and inspired me again.

In 10th month He lost his complete ability to speak now we were using signal language to understand his needs better.

In 11th month He started to use a machine for respiration and he was making so much effort to even to move 1 finger. He lost 80 90 percent of his muscle mass. Lungs , Voice , Bowels none of his muscles are working except his hearth.

After a year God heard my voice and he took himself next to him. I must admit eventhough we knew the outcome of this disease . It was never easy because we were the witness of this whole process.

Picture of my father

After witnessing how destructive this disease is I faced with some pshycological problems because I know this disease got chance to be genetic. I lived an entire year living in terror and grief , but with all those feelings and paranoia I was able to accepted by some universities in Turkey.

This month 2 year passed by lightning speed after the death of my father . The best part of human brain is it has ability to erase the bad memories that stresses you out. Now I'm completing my Major in Advertisement and Public Relations and I only remember the joyful moments that I had with My Father.

REST IN PEACE BIG GUY

So lets come back the reason why I wrote this article. I really don't think ice bucket challange made any difference about this challange and I really wonder what happened all the money collected for research purposes. I know it is really hard to find cure to neruological diseases. But I strongly think that they should at least continue to educate people about this disease and continue their work in Public relations.