I CAN CHANGE

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Everyone of us can change if we have a mission and if we are motivated!

Our ability to change is a very important component of emotional intelligence. We as adults have a responsibility to help our children to identify their goals and we must teach them how to stay motivated to achieve these goals.

Important information for parents and teachers.

• Change the advice you give your child so often "Do your best" to "Take part, experience and enjoy" Your best is just an illusion because non of us ever knows our best in given situations.
• Don't put to much emphases on performance rather drive away the fear of failure.
• You can help the child to process his/her fear of failure, the unknown or to be daring by encouraging them to talk about the different possibilities change can bring about.
• Teach your child that change is part of life.
• A person or child with self confidence do not see themselves as victims of failure they see it as an opportunity to grow.
• Visualize the things you want to be or do, your brain can not distinguish between reality and fiction. This is a very powerful tool on your way
  to change.
• Visualize your change, let your inner voice be constructive and give yourself a pat on the back for every small little victory.
• It is also important to have a mission as a family it can be:
• Who are we, what are we doing, how do we plan to do things, What is motivating us to do these things.
• The more passionate you feel about something the more motivated you will be to achieve it and the more energy you will have to succeed.
• Strengthen your child's dreams and goals in a positive way how far fetched it may seem to you, never demotivate a child who aims high.
• People who can not motivate themselves is just reacting on what is happening to them, they tend to get depressed and they would easily give up if their first attempt fails.

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Things your child should know:

1. Get an emotional mentor like a teacher or a sports coach that can inspire and motivate you.
2. It is better to spend time and energy on things that you can do something about.
3. If you can motivate yourself concerning your homework you will be less absent, more productive and creative and you will need less supervision.
4. To change asks supple thinking and the ability to see a problem out of different perspectives.
5. Remember that to make mistakes mean chances to grow.
6. Family and friends can be your sources for motivation.
7. If you always just do the things you like and that is known to you, you will never learn how to do new things.
8. You need to believe in yourself, you must have the skills to handle uncertainty with self confidence and purposefulness.
9. Through visualizing what you want to achieve you strenghthen your self motivation to work on the problem.
10. Decorate your room with pictures and letters with motivational quotes.
    
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Activities to do to help your child understand motivation, change and goals:

• Let your child make a collage of all the negative things in his/her life, she/he then has to paste a positive picture over the part of the collage that he/she has mastered. 6-11 years.
• Ask your child to write down the one situation he/she can not forget, he/she then have to ask themselves what they could do or change about the situation now. 11-15+ years
• The child can look for a specific person in his/her community that can help them to achieve their goal.
• Encourage your child to surprise someone with a card or flowers when that person will expect it the least. 2-15+ years
• If the child feels his energy levels is dropping he/she should get up and dance or jump around. If they listen to lively music their energy levels will rise again. Let them pick a song that represents their mission. 2-15= years
• Suggest to the child that he/she must write down all their dreams and goals on colourful paper and then they must put in up where they can see it all around their room. 11-15+ years
• Ask the child to identify a need in the school, community or in his/her family and to do something about it. 11-15+ years.

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