Teething Problems (NSOGBU EZE)

I can remember the first time I lost a tooth. I was young then, about five or six. I still believed what I was told. I was open minded, other kids came around to play with me, adults bought me gifts of chocolate and sweets. My grandmother lived with us, and she occupied a special place in my mind, because she was the most generous adult around, excepting my parents.

Before I lost my tooth, some other kids around me had begun to lose theirs too. It was quite a sight to witness their toothless smiles. I was king of this dentally challenged horde; as the only kid around with a complete set of teeth.

In the evenings when we gathered at my house to play, I teased them. ‘‘Did you guys trade your teeth for beancake with the beancake seller at the junction?’’ I’d ask and burst into laughter. Of course it goes without saying that I alone laughed at these jokes.

I woke the next morning to feel a loose tooth at the left side of my jaw. I patted it with my tongue, pushed and prodded until it fell off, leaving a cold, clammy feeling behind.

I picked it up and held it in my palm, my eyes watering, I dashed to my parents room. Already I was thinking of how my friends would react to this news. The jester has become the joke.

The noise of the door opening startled my parents awake. Since the matter was an urgent one I was pardoned for barging into the room without knocking.

‘What’s wrong baby?’ my mum asked using her hands to indicate that I should come forward. I went and showed them the tooth.

My father took one look at the tooth in my hand, and burst into laughter, enraging me. It was official, I was a raging joke. My mother gathered me in her arms. ‘Don’t worry about it baby,’ she said.

‘No mummy, my tooth will never grow back! Now I’ll look like Ebuka, Jude, and Chiamaka!’ I said, listing some of the recent victims of fallen teeth.

My dad laughed again and patted my head. ‘Oh to be a child,’ he said.

‘ Listen, sweetheart , my mum said. There’s a trick I know to make your tooth grow back.’

‘What trick?’ I asked, becoming attentive.

‘Well it’s simple. We’ll take the tooth outside and throw it on the roof, and in no time it will appear back in your mouth!’

I stared at them, Wile E.Coyote bursting into the room at that moment seemed a more plausible occurrence than what they were suggesting. I began crying again. My father groaned, and as my mum reached over to smack his shoulder, I freed myself from her grip and dashed out of the room, without closing the door behind me.
My father took one look at the tooth in my hand, and burst into laughter, enraging me. It was official, I was a raging joke. My mother gathered me in her arms. ‘Don’t worry about it baby,’ she said.

I went to my grandmother’s room, knowing she’d be wiser and more caring than those two jokers in the other bedroom. Grandmother was lying on the bed when I walked in through the door. She turned to find me looking discomfited.

‘What’s wrong my dear?’ she asked, her weak bones making her rise gently from the bed, she gestured at me to come closer. I opened my mouth to show the empty slot, and my palm to show her the tooth.

’How did this happen? I hope you didn’t pull it out yourself?’ she held my jaw, and inspected the site.

‘No, it fell out this morning as I brushed my teeth! What can I do to make it grow back immediately? I don’t want my friends making fun of me when we gather to play.’

She smiled, patted my head and then said, ‘There was a trick I performed when I was your age, and was faced with this same challenge.’

‘What was that ma?’ I asked, becoming attentive.

‘It’s simple. I threw the tooth on the roof for a bird to see. The bird took it, soared high with it, and pleaded to the creator for a replacement. By the next morning when I woke, my tooth was back.’

When she finished talking, she rose from the bed, took my hand, and led me outside. I stood facing the house, and then she pointed at the roof, and told me that if I wanted my tooth back, I had to throw it with all my energy. And so I did, propelling the tooth onto the roof with a force that came from within my gut.

I stayed at home all through that day, not daring to go face my friends. I knew that they’d be worried by my absence, I thought that it wouldn’t matter, since I’d be back with them the next day.

I stayed close to my grandmother throughout, trying as much as possible not to feel the soft, empty spot in my mouth with my tongue.

When night finally arrived, I was relieved and grateful. All I had to do was close my eyes and go to sleep, and when I woke, everything would be back to normal.

Next morning, I lay on my bed, and as I opened my eyes i patted my gums with my tongue. The gap was still empty. I sat forward on my bed, my pulse quickening, and investigated again. Still the same result. I sprang up and ran to my grandmother’s room.

Once again she woke up to listen to me without any complaint. When I told her what had happened, she laughed and said, ‘’Silly boy, no bird has seen your tooth yet, that’s why. Let’s wait until one takes it to the Creator.’’

And so I waited for two more days, until I became impatient with waiting. I decided to do something about it myself. I would climb to the roof of the house and position the tooth in such a way any passing bird would see it and pick it up.

There was a ladder at the backyard, and so I took it and leaned it against the wall of our house, but that’s when my father saw me and shouted at me demanding I return the ladder back to where I’d found it. I obeyed him, but with tears in my eyes.

When my mother saw me and tried to comfort me, I refused to listen to her. Even my grandmother was repulsive to me. They were all liars. They’d lied about my tooth ever growing back.

More days passed, and I soon got used to my tooth's absence, even managing to smile along with my mates, who teased me for joining the missing tooth club. By now some of them had even more missing teeth, their entire dentition like a Nigerian highway, pot-holed and rough.

I trained myself not to notice the missing tooth, and so I didn’t even realize when it grew back, but I noticed every stage of my mum’s pregnancy and stomach growth. The day my father rushed her to the hospital, my grandmother smiled at me and said I was about to have a baby brother or sister.

When they returned from the hospital, I saw that it was true, my grandmother could still tell the truth, I had a baby sister!

I watched her grow, and I was very excited when she learnt how to walk, and then talk. I now had a mate, an assistant, as I thought of her. We played together all the time, and our parents had to stop us from dishevelling the house with our energy.

She grew until she arrived at the same age I was when I lost my first tooth, and she lost hers too.